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1.我有一个同学,男,因为不近女色,一直都是童子身,所以我们都叫他处长,后来才知道他不近女色的原因是因为他原来是个小受,所以我们现在都改口叫他局长
2.中午在医院跟一个大哥聊天聊的热火朝天的。晚上别人才告诉我他是个智障,我现在怀疑我的智商了。



3.本人双胞胎,割了弟弟的jj, 二十多年了每次和弟吵架我都抓狂,只因他那句,哥俩好gan大嫂,大哥来了我就跑。。。。


4.十三岁那时,很傻很天真主要是二。大姨妈刚来,跟一男的同桌,wsj没带够,问同桌借,同桌那时更傻更天真,说他没来,然后姐就把妈咪教我的注意项目给他说了一遍,说他来的时候就有用了,同桌认认真真写在记事本上了,还去便利店买了一包七度空间,给了我两个,剩下的你说是你以后来了要用的。。,最近听说你谈女朋友了,那啥,可以给你女朋友用了。。。


5.为什么要割,刚才去饭馆吃饭,要了一个砂锅面,正吃着进来一个妹子,服务员问她吃点啥,妹子环视一周,指着我的面说我要吃那个,我本着糗百精神,遂双手成护碗壮,说了两个字:不行,


6.本人吊丝男一枚~~~~简短不割~~~~一次和朋友打麻将,对面一年轻妈妈准备给小孩哺乳,我不知道原来乳汁可以喷那么远,一米多的桌子啊~HLL的呈抛物线喷了我一脸……


7.新闻上说地沟油和普通油检测不出来区别。我想知道,这究竟是说地沟油和普通油质量一样,还是说普通油和地沟油质量一样。。。。


8.昨晚,从班长同桌桌子里翻出瓶木瓜护手霜什么的,于是我就贱贱的问班长:”木瓜不是丰的X么,怎么还来护手?”班长一脸正义的说:先抹在手上再去摸X,效果一样~…”这还不是GC, GC是.这个时候前面一二货淡定的掏出了个木瓜的润唇膏。。。。。。。


9.刚刚看tx网的,大学生亢逸考公务员,被问及月经史。神级回复!


——小王,通知小李明天跟我出差。
——等等,我查一下。领导,小李这两天来月经了,换小张去吧?

10.本人大学生一枚,有天上课,老师在上面滔滔不绝,但是很无聊,很多人都偷偷睡了,我刚准备入睡,老师突然激动的说,你们来上大学,你爹就是给你买了两张火车票么,在教室是硬座,回宿舍就是软卧么。

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About the game:


USA as a world power? In E-Sim it is possible!

In E-Sim we have a huge, living world, which is a mirror copy of the Earth. Well, maybe not completely mirrored, because the balance of power in this virtual world looks a bit different than in real life. In E-Sim, USA does not have to be a world superpower, It can be efficiently managed as a much smaller country that has entrepreneurial citizens that support it's foundation. Everything depends on the players themselves and how they decide to shape the political map of the game.

Work for the good of your country and see it rise to an empire.

Activities in this game are divided into several modules. First is the economy as a citizen in a country of your choice you must work to earn money, which you will get to spend for example, on food or purchase of weapons which are critical for your progress as a fighter. You will work in either private companies which are owned by players or government companies which are owned by the state. After progressing in the game you will finally get the opportunity to set up your own business and hire other players. If it prospers, we can even change it into a joint-stock company and enter the stock market and get even more money in this way.


In E-Sim, international wars are nothing out of the ordinary.

"E-Sim is one of the most unique browser games out there"

Become an influential politician.

The second module is a politics. Just like in real life politics in E-Sim are an extremely powerful tool that can be used for your own purposes. From time to time there are elections in the game in which you will not only vote, but also have the ability to run for the head of the party you're in. You can also apply for congress, where once elected you will be given the right to vote on laws proposed by your fellow congress members or your president and propose laws yourself. Voting on laws is important for your country as it can shape the lives of those around you. You can also try to become the head of a given party, and even take part in presidential elections and decide on the shape of the foreign policy of a given state (for example, who to declare war on). Career in politics is obviously not easy and in order to succeed in it, you have to have a good plan and compete for the votes of voters.


You can go bankrupt or become a rich man while playing the stock market.

The international war.

The last and probably the most important module is military. In E-Sim, countries are constantly fighting each other for control over territories which in return grant them access to more valuable raw materials. For this purpose, they form alliances, they fight international wars, but they also have to deal with, for example, uprisings in conquered countries or civil wars, which may explode on their territory. You can also take part in these clashes, although you are also given the opportunity to lead a life as a pacifist who focuses on other activities in the game (for example, running a successful newspaper or selling products).


At the auction you can sell or buy your dream inventory.

E-Sim is a unique browser game. It's creators ensured realistic representation of the mechanisms present in the real world and gave all power to the players who shape the image of the virtual Earth according to their own. So come and join them and help your country achieve its full potential.


Invest, produce and sell - be an entrepreneur in E-Sim.


Take part in numerous events for the E-Sim community.


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