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1.昨天晚上用微信摇一摇摇到一个小美眉，看到她的签名我当时就震惊了:每天晚上睡觉前我都要亲一下我的小内内，感谢它每天都为我装B……
2.一日听到邻居家小萝莉唱大风车，把我憋成内伤.她是这样唱地“大风车呀直呦呦转，他妈滴，他妈滴真好看.................
3.刮完头洗完澡，晾好衣服站阳台抽烟，吹着凉风喷云吐雾间，楼下一B孩子扯着嗓子喊“秃驴”“秃驴”，刹那间怒从心头起恶向胆边生，就算老衲开着阳台灯有些交相辉映，可這厮眼神儿也忒好了，这儿可是五层！正要回骂你爹也秃，GC来了。.....长江后浪割前浪.........就听对面楼一妇女字正腔圆的回喊“涂律不在家！”
4.朋友有一辆面包车，一天早晨特别冷，面包车前挡风玻璃全都结满了一层冰，朋友懒啊，就擦出一个小洞，勉强能看见前面的那种，就开车上路了，没走多远就被**拦下来了，下车后，**第一句话就是“大哥，你以前是开坦克的吧！---
5.楼主在迅雷工作，今天听同事说，这几天会员的付费用户每天比平常增加了10万，遂问原因，这货邪恶的说：李老师的片上了，6个G，为此还崩了一台服务器.、
6.“当有一扇门关上时，就会有另一扇门开启。”我就有一辆这种破车。。。。。
7.和女友吵架冷战，女友上我QQ到她空间留言“对不起，我错了”然后自己回复"哼！懒得理你……"。我……
8.一句话:同学的QQ签名:小时候，有很多姐姐，阿姨喜欢弹我的小jj，我很不愉快，现在长大了，弹的人少了，我也很不愉快！→_→
9.邻居是个超级大胖子，刚才去澡堂回来愤愤道坚决减肥！问他咋舍得这身肥肉。他说胖子洗澡都超级贵。。遂解释给我听，澡票10块，搓澡10块。然后洗好澡一屁股坐塌了个躺椅，赔300.。。。。。。
10.老婆怀孕三个月了……各种担心 各种忧虑……刚给我发了条短息 一字不删 我突然想到我省了十个月的卫生巾还不够买一个月的尿布
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About the game:
USA as a world power? In E-Sim it is possible!
In E-Sim we have a huge, living world, which is a mirror copy of the Earth. Well, maybe not completely mirrored, because the balance of power in this virtual world looks a bit different than in real life. In E-Sim, USA does not have to be a world superpower, It can be efficiently managed as a much smaller country that has entrepreneurial citizens that support it's foundation. Everything depends on the players themselves and how they decide to shape the political map of the game.
Work for the good of your country and see it rise to an empire.
Activities in this game are divided into several modules. First is the economy as a citizen in a country of your choice you must work to earn money, which you will get to spend for example, on food or purchase of weapons which are critical for your progress as a fighter. You will work in either private companies which are owned by players or government companies which are owned by the state. After progressing in the game you will finally get the opportunity to set up your own business and hire other players. If it prospers, we can even change it into a joint-stock company and enter the stock market and get even more money in this way.
In E-Sim, international wars are nothing out of the ordinary.
Become an influential politician.
The second module is a politics. Just like in real life politics in E-Sim are an extremely powerful tool that can be used for your own purposes. From time to time there are elections in the game in which you will not only vote, but also have the ability to run for the head of the party you're in. You can also apply for congress, where once elected you will be given the right to vote on laws proposed by your fellow congress members or your president and propose laws yourself. Voting on laws is important for your country as it can shape the lives of those around you. You can also try to become the head of a given party, and even take part in presidential elections and decide on the shape of the foreign policy of a given state (for example, who to declare war on). Career in politics is obviously not easy and in order to succeed in it, you have to have a good plan and compete for the votes of voters.
You can go bankrupt or become a rich man while playing the stock market.
The international war.
The last and probably the most important module is military. In E-Sim, countries are constantly fighting each other for control over territories which in return grant them access to more valuable raw materials. For this purpose, they form alliances, they fight international wars, but they also have to deal with, for example, uprisings in conquered countries or civil wars, which may explode on their territory. You can also take part in these clashes, although you are also given the opportunity to lead a life as a pacifist who focuses on other activities in the game (for example, running a successful newspaper or selling products).
At the auction you can sell or buy your dream inventory.
E-Sim is a unique browser game. It's creators ensured realistic representation of the mechanisms present in the real world and gave all power to the players who shape the image of the virtual Earth according to their own. So come and join them and help your country achieve its full potential.
Invest, produce and sell - be an entrepreneur in E-Sim.
Take part in numerous events for the E-Sim community.
