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2.我室友的朋友今天高考 那人成绩不好 他考完数学给我室友发消息 内容如下：我要死了 我真的想死了 今天我们考数学 考到一半的时候 我前面的那个人 我们班的第三名 居然哭了 然后全考场的人都跟着哭了起来 我当时真的凌乱了 尼玛为什么哭啊 出了考场我才知道 原来是数学太难了 可怜我连难不难都不知道啊
3.话说昨天去表姐家，正巧碰到表姐给两岁的小外甥买了一套家居服，小外甥吵着要穿，穿上以后小宝贝呼呼跑到外公的房间来了句：“外公，好看吗？”我姨夫说了句不好看，小宝贝哇哇哇的哭着让他妈妈给他脱下来，然后光着身子又去问他外公：“这样好看吗？”他外公说好看好看，小外甥就这么光了一上午啊！！！
4.本人苦逼发型师一枚，割掉老板小jj！话说有一天来了一位顾客要染头发，于是我就各种推荐，本来想说姐姐你染这颜色看起来可靓了，没想到口误竟然说成可浪了，这不是GC.没想到这姐姐不但没生气，反而华丽丽的来了句小伙子就染它了。。。。。。
5.小区门口有家幼儿园，此为背景。------我也来割割------早上上班，忽然听见一个小萝莉在大喊：“救命啊！救命啊！有人要被送幼儿园了！”喊声那叫一个凄惨啊
6.家有正太一岁半，个性执拗，软硬不吃，各种无奈有木有？一一一一偶然用撒娇的语气对他提要求，这小子竟然羞答答的很好说话起来，再嗲声嗲气的试几次，这屁男孩纸就任我摆布、无怨无悔了。儿子，就这点功力以后出去闯荡江湖，随便一个小妖孽就吃定你啦
7.话说我们班有俩同学天天在宿舍逃课睡觉，为了防止老师查宿舍把门锁了————一个两个————
有一天这俩正在睡觉，突然门开了。他俩以为老师来了，翻身跃起。但是当那人开门进来以后俩同学发现貌似是个贼。后来。。后来这俩同学就被全校通报表扬了。
8.昨天哥生日。。都喝的差不多，开始吃蛋糕，蜡烛还没吹，你们就砸到我脸上了，脸上还没舔，你们就跟邻桌的人打起来了，我还没动手，你们就跑完了，我还没有跑，警察就来了。尼玛我这个生日真悲催
9.一次语文课，老师提问“文中一共写了几件事？这两件事有什么联系？”
一同学严肃的说
“老师，你的问题已经出卖了你。。”
10.早上看到好多公车私车出租车接送学生高考，爸爸妈妈爷爷姥爷奶奶老奶等在学校外面陪孩子高考，我就想起了我那时候，高考完回家，我妈问咋回来了，放假了吗？我：嗯。过了n天，我拿着大学录取通知书回来，我妈一脸惊讶说：啥时候考的？
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About the game:
USA as a world power? In E-Sim it is possible!
In E-Sim we have a huge, living world, which is a mirror copy of the Earth. Well, maybe not completely mirrored, because the balance of power in this virtual world looks a bit different than in real life. In E-Sim, USA does not have to be a world superpower, It can be efficiently managed as a much smaller country that has entrepreneurial citizens that support it's foundation. Everything depends on the players themselves and how they decide to shape the political map of the game.
Work for the good of your country and see it rise to an empire.
Activities in this game are divided into several modules. First is the economy as a citizen in a country of your choice you must work to earn money, which you will get to spend for example, on food or purchase of weapons which are critical for your progress as a fighter. You will work in either private companies which are owned by players or government companies which are owned by the state. After progressing in the game you will finally get the opportunity to set up your own business and hire other players. If it prospers, we can even change it into a joint-stock company and enter the stock market and get even more money in this way.
In E-Sim, international wars are nothing out of the ordinary.
Become an influential politician.
The second module is a politics. Just like in real life politics in E-Sim are an extremely powerful tool that can be used for your own purposes. From time to time there are elections in the game in which you will not only vote, but also have the ability to run for the head of the party you're in. You can also apply for congress, where once elected you will be given the right to vote on laws proposed by your fellow congress members or your president and propose laws yourself. Voting on laws is important for your country as it can shape the lives of those around you. You can also try to become the head of a given party, and even take part in presidential elections and decide on the shape of the foreign policy of a given state (for example, who to declare war on). Career in politics is obviously not easy and in order to succeed in it, you have to have a good plan and compete for the votes of voters.
You can go bankrupt or become a rich man while playing the stock market.
The international war.
The last and probably the most important module is military. In E-Sim, countries are constantly fighting each other for control over territories which in return grant them access to more valuable raw materials. For this purpose, they form alliances, they fight international wars, but they also have to deal with, for example, uprisings in conquered countries or civil wars, which may explode on their territory. You can also take part in these clashes, although you are also given the opportunity to lead a life as a pacifist who focuses on other activities in the game (for example, running a successful newspaper or selling products).
At the auction you can sell or buy your dream inventory.
E-Sim is a unique browser game. It's creators ensured realistic representation of the mechanisms present in the real world and gave all power to the players who shape the image of the virtual Earth according to their own. So come and join them and help your country achieve its full potential.
Invest, produce and sell - be an entrepreneur in E-Sim.
Take part in numerous events for the E-Sim community.
