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2.lz妹纸，小时候家里的厕所在外面，农村通常这样的。一天哥哥去厕所没拿纸，让我送点纸，我一个姑娘家家的，就拿了个长竹竿，把纸绑在一端，然后想把竹竿送到厕所门口让哥哥把纸拿下来就行了，可是…可是…妹纸我用竹竿把哥哥捅到坑里了…然后一个星期哥哥吃饭不准上饭桌。。。
3.昨晚跟老公在沙发上吃西瓜聊天-------我跟老公说:“人家都说我长相旺夫，结婚好几年了你怎么也不旺啊~”，老公抬头看我两秒把西瓜咽下去，我以为他又要说我啥，结果他一张嘴:“汪~汪汪汪”
幼儿园小班在表演六一节目，父母都要参加，进场的时候喊口号。 小一班喊：小一小一，勇夺第一； 小二班喊：小二小二，独一无二； 小三班喊：小三小三，爸爸喜欢！
4.个新鲜的。没有不割。宝宝六一节幼儿园有节目表演<<小小的猪>>。开场是小朋友都趴在地上，表示在睡觉。其他小朋友都起来表演了，只有一个小朋友一直趴在地上，一动不动。直到表演结束，老师才把这个真的睡着的小朋友抱下场。。。。
5.前段时间家里的野菜张势茂盛，老妈一早就给我说今天给哟做野菜。割割割……下午回家，老妈已经把菜做好了，我吃了一口觉得太难吃，可一想到老妈很辛苦地给我拔野菜，就硬着头皮继续吃，看老妈一直看着我吃，我问：妈你怎么不吃啊？
我妈说：吃了一口发现不对，好像拔成野草了……我……
6.初中时有一个好姐妹，她爸妈长相极不般配，妈妈超级漂亮，爸爸一般偏下。因为关系好，我们就问道，你妈怎么嫁给你爸爸了？
她笑笑，＂我也问过。当时我爸是这么回答的——当年追你妈的人太多，由于我鹤立鸡群，所以你妈毅然决然选择了我！而我妈是这么回答的——当时追我的人很多，你爸爸鸡立鹤群，看着怪可怜的，所以。。。。。＂
7.宿舍老六在摇微信，老二说:“你个煞比，jb跟牙签似的，还好意思玩微信!“我们一听，这不能忍啊，大声咋呼，老六，这要是有人说我，我非得撸死他!只听老六静静的放下手机，说:超哥，来，来，我给你剔剔牙。。，，。瞬间感觉自己弱爆了。。
8.昨天晚上。2B舍友又说梦话了。只听他说:啊！好多美女啊！XX快来！听过之后LZ顿时内牛满面啊！这才是好兄弟啊！连做梦梦到美女还能想得起我。。。。
9.快六月了，写个我当年高考的事吧...高三每天早晨要跑操，每个班需要有个口号，一般是：“清华北大在我脚下”这种，班主任让我们班每个人都想一个然后选一个最好的，有一个二货同学写的是：“清华北大，不怕不怕，考个三本，一样伟大”
10.一朋友是大学导员，特能喝酒那种，白酒论瓶喝啤酒论箱喝。。。咯咯咯。。。一次带的学生毕业吃散伙饭，喝的昏天暗地，一学生哭着抱住了他，一边哭一边抱还一边说:老师啊，以后少喝点吧，我三大爷就是这么喝死的呀。。。
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About the game:
USA as a world power? In E-Sim it is possible!
In E-Sim we have a huge, living world, which is a mirror copy of the Earth. Well, maybe not completely mirrored, because the balance of power in this virtual world looks a bit different than in real life. In E-Sim, USA does not have to be a world superpower, It can be efficiently managed as a much smaller country that has entrepreneurial citizens that support it's foundation. Everything depends on the players themselves and how they decide to shape the political map of the game.
Work for the good of your country and see it rise to an empire.
Activities in this game are divided into several modules. First is the economy as a citizen in a country of your choice you must work to earn money, which you will get to spend for example, on food or purchase of weapons which are critical for your progress as a fighter. You will work in either private companies which are owned by players or government companies which are owned by the state. After progressing in the game you will finally get the opportunity to set up your own business and hire other players. If it prospers, we can even change it into a joint-stock company and enter the stock market and get even more money in this way.
In E-Sim, international wars are nothing out of the ordinary.
Become an influential politician.
The second module is a politics. Just like in real life politics in E-Sim are an extremely powerful tool that can be used for your own purposes. From time to time there are elections in the game in which you will not only vote, but also have the ability to run for the head of the party you're in. You can also apply for congress, where once elected you will be given the right to vote on laws proposed by your fellow congress members or your president and propose laws yourself. Voting on laws is important for your country as it can shape the lives of those around you. You can also try to become the head of a given party, and even take part in presidential elections and decide on the shape of the foreign policy of a given state (for example, who to declare war on). Career in politics is obviously not easy and in order to succeed in it, you have to have a good plan and compete for the votes of voters.
You can go bankrupt or become a rich man while playing the stock market.
The international war.
The last and probably the most important module is military. In E-Sim, countries are constantly fighting each other for control over territories which in return grant them access to more valuable raw materials. For this purpose, they form alliances, they fight international wars, but they also have to deal with, for example, uprisings in conquered countries or civil wars, which may explode on their territory. You can also take part in these clashes, although you are also given the opportunity to lead a life as a pacifist who focuses on other activities in the game (for example, running a successful newspaper or selling products).
At the auction you can sell or buy your dream inventory.
E-Sim is a unique browser game. It's creators ensured realistic representation of the mechanisms present in the real world and gave all power to the players who shape the image of the virtual Earth according to their own. So come and join them and help your country achieve its full potential.
Invest, produce and sell - be an entrepreneur in E-Sim.
Take part in numerous events for the E-Sim community.
