Esim - NEWBIES! Six realities that you have to know about ePH politics
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Hi there, newbies! How's you stay in ePH so far? While everything here is mostly calm and seemingly in order, some facts aren't just obvious on face value. Here's my way of introducing you to our exciting world!

Do you have plans of running for Congress or becoming the next CP of ePH? This article is for you! I will try to orient you on some of the hard facts about politics here in e-Philippines. Here goes and read on!

1. The Philippines is a single party state (just like real-life China) led by the Junji Battalion or JB, a politico-military group composed mostly of Filipino veterans and their pawns. Almost all political parties are directly or indirectly influenced by JB, hence, the supposedly "democracy" in the country is a fluke.



To learn more about the Junji Battalion, their history of rebellion and treachery and how they once fought for Malaysia against the Philippines, please refer to all my previous articles .

2. The Philippines has a long history of political dynasty with very infrequent (and usually tumultuous) episodes of interruptions, including my time as the president from October to November 2013 , which was the only non-JB administration in the last ten months.

3. Democracy in the Philippines is like your lovelife: it doesn't exist. To be able to even run for Congress, you have to be, at least, friends with your party leader who's most likely a Junji henchman or a Junji fling. Also, be nice to the Junji veterans and, like, greet them each time you log on to IRC. Don't expect a response from them though because they're gods and gods do not interact with newbies.



4. You cannot criticize any of the government's policies unless you want to be hated forever and be forced to change citizenship (unless you have a high EQ). Keep in mind that you're here to serve the government and fight for ePH to make sure the JB maintains their grip on power. The key to not become an outcast here is to worship the Junji lords.

5. Most Filipino players are predominantly Junji fanatics. Others are scared of them and so they pretend to like them. Saying mean things about the Junji veterans is the easiest way to commit social suicide. Fans will burn you.

6. But if you're lucky, you'll meet a few courageous players here who, just like me, are a champion of political freedom, equality and democracy and aren't scared of the Junji. Nandiyan lang ang mga 'yan, nagmamatyag. Naghihintay ng tamang panahon para ipamalas ang kanilang presensya.



So, good luck, newbies! If you have questions, do not hesitate to message me. Enjoy your stay in this exciting world of e-Sim!

Previous article:
The Asian Century (11 years ago)

Next article:
Vietnam: Land of the Ascending Dragon (11 years ago)

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