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工地一爷俩蹲路边小歇,对面走来一美女,两人目不转睛的看着。
突然父亲朝美女腿上吐口痰,被美女愤怒的甩了一巴掌。
之后,儿子纳闷问:那美女不正点么?
“正点”
“那你……?”
“本来我是想吹口哨来着,一激动吐了口痰………”

寝室一吊丝,每次洗澡时间特长。后来问之,曰:我洗澡不带毛巾。
又问:那你怎么干着出来?
这货说:我站那晾干了才出来的!

坐公交车,上来个尼姑。
坐下没过多久,她手机响了,铃声是《清心咒》。
她从兜里拿出一索爱LT18I,电话通了大概有一刻钟。
刚开始细声细语,越说越激动,最后尼姑忽然尖叫一声“你到底还爱不爱我?我怀孕了!”
整部车突然安静了下来!

我是做理发的。有天一小孩过来剪完头发没带钱,然后他跟我说:“叔叔上个月我在这里剪的。”
“嗯,我记得啊。”
“妈妈说这里三个月保修的。”

公司妹纸五千多的项链丢了,在公司哭的很伤心。
大家都去安慰她,我也过去劝解,我说:“我之前丢过比这个还贵的东西呢,可是丢了就丢了,不要再可惜啦。”
她转头问我说:“你丢过什么啊。”
我说:“丢人”
随后她哭的更伤心了。

星期天,小由美子跟爸爸去动物园看狮子,他们来到狮子馆,
小由美子高兴得不住地问这问那,
看了一会,她突然显得不安起来,爸爸问她有什么不顺心的事。
“爸爸,我有点害怕,”小由美子,颤抖着声音答道:“如果这头狮子挣脱出笼,把你吃掉的话,那我该乘几路电车回家呢?”

不要九十!不要八十!七十也不收你的!现在只要六十!
你没有听错!就是六十!太疯狂了简直!只要六十就可以让孩子们回家过大年!
好礼送不停!心动不如行动!老师们快拿起手中的红笔在试卷上画个60吧!
三分天注定,七分师生情,老师,我已经尽力了,剩下来靠你了,出题不易必自毙!



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About the game:


USA as a world power? In E-Sim it is possible!

In E-Sim we have a huge, living world, which is a mirror copy of the Earth. Well, maybe not completely mirrored, because the balance of power in this virtual world looks a bit different than in real life. In E-Sim, USA does not have to be a world superpower, It can be efficiently managed as a much smaller country that has entrepreneurial citizens that support it's foundation. Everything depends on the players themselves and how they decide to shape the political map of the game.

Work for the good of your country and see it rise to an empire.

Activities in this game are divided into several modules. First is the economy as a citizen in a country of your choice you must work to earn money, which you will get to spend for example, on food or purchase of weapons which are critical for your progress as a fighter. You will work in either private companies which are owned by players or government companies which are owned by the state. After progressing in the game you will finally get the opportunity to set up your own business and hire other players. If it prospers, we can even change it into a joint-stock company and enter the stock market and get even more money in this way.


In E-Sim, international wars are nothing out of the ordinary.

"E-Sim is one of the most unique browser games out there"

Become an influential politician.

The second module is a politics. Just like in real life politics in E-Sim are an extremely powerful tool that can be used for your own purposes. From time to time there are elections in the game in which you will not only vote, but also have the ability to run for the head of the party you're in. You can also apply for congress, where once elected you will be given the right to vote on laws proposed by your fellow congress members or your president and propose laws yourself. Voting on laws is important for your country as it can shape the lives of those around you. You can also try to become the head of a given party, and even take part in presidential elections and decide on the shape of the foreign policy of a given state (for example, who to declare war on). Career in politics is obviously not easy and in order to succeed in it, you have to have a good plan and compete for the votes of voters.


You can go bankrupt or become a rich man while playing the stock market.

The international war.

The last and probably the most important module is military. In E-Sim, countries are constantly fighting each other for control over territories which in return grant them access to more valuable raw materials. For this purpose, they form alliances, they fight international wars, but they also have to deal with, for example, uprisings in conquered countries or civil wars, which may explode on their territory. You can also take part in these clashes, although you are also given the opportunity to lead a life as a pacifist who focuses on other activities in the game (for example, running a successful newspaper or selling products).


At the auction you can sell or buy your dream inventory.

E-Sim is a unique browser game. It's creators ensured realistic representation of the mechanisms present in the real world and gave all power to the players who shape the image of the virtual Earth according to their own. So come and join them and help your country achieve its full potential.


Invest, produce and sell - be an entrepreneur in E-Sim.


Take part in numerous events for the E-Sim community.


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