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1.我说表弟啊,
你把你的18岁电影单独存个盘,我没意见;
你把你的18岁电影设置为隐藏,我还没意见;
可是,你不要这个盘里其他东西都不放啊,F盘都变红了,没空间了啊,打开却什么文件都没有,我勒个去……
我说表弟啊,你可长点心吧!

2.今天北京暴雨,刷微博的时候看到一哥们说:尼玛,这雨下的,今天多少哥们不认识自己媳妇了。。。

3.发发看。第一次发。我和女友路过一小学门口。。。。。。哥?。。。。。。突然一小朋友朝我们冲过来。目测8岁的样子。冲到我面前大叫一声:“爸爸!”我当时还没反应过来。楼主我才20啊。女友18有木有。周围接孩子回家的叔叔阿姨笑而不语的看着我和女友。当然这还没完。他又冲女友大喊:“妈妈!”还没等我们反应过来。他已经冲回一个小萝莉旁边。说:“我已经喊完了,现在你可以做我老婆了吧。”那萝莉羞涩的点点头。正太高兴的带走了萝莉。留下我和女友在风中凌乱。。。。


4.简短不割,25岁的我,60年一遇的暴雨已经遭遇两次了……

5.本人男,22,昨天我侄子订婚,(本人辈分比较大),按习俗吃饭之前放鞭炮,在我们这有说法,点鞭炮的要童男----割了,不用了-----然后表兄弟6,7个,……连小我5岁的表弟说他不可以了,于是就剩哥一个人苦逼着脸点的鞭炮……真心。。。。。。。。


6.今天和一个学妹聊起怎么对付宿舍里的苍蝇
====割了一个,再长一双====
学妹说,拿出定型水狂喷那苍蝇。然后你会看见那货的翅膀开始定型,它越飞越累,越飞越慢,然后你就玩死它吧!!!妹子狂笑。。。。。。然后我就石化了////

话说这个方法听起来很流逼啊!


7.我们这最近发生了一件相当神奇的事•••••••••这样割?••••••••••
一女,据说是公务员,酒醉后在自助银行内被一流浪汉QJ了,早晨醒来去报警了,后来警方看了当天晚上的监控录像,果断拘留了那女的••••••••••
没错,根据录像上看,那女的主动的,那个流浪汉还拼命挣扎反抗了。
可怜的老爷们啊•••••••••••

8.据悉,北京海是我国领海中唯一没有与外国有海权纠纷的海域,请各位渔民放心捕鱼,无需担心外国军舰骚扰。

9.刚才吃饭新闻播丹弗枪击案,我说天朝这方面做得不错禁枪就是安全啊。老爸看了我一眼说:“不禁枪,每天不知道得死多少官员!”(刹那间我明白了禁枪的原因)


10.想过八戒的般的生活 却给了我悟空般的压力。但只有沙僧的本事。时不时还能听到唐僧般的唠叨''

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About the game:


USA as a world power? In E-Sim it is possible!

In E-Sim we have a huge, living world, which is a mirror copy of the Earth. Well, maybe not completely mirrored, because the balance of power in this virtual world looks a bit different than in real life. In E-Sim, USA does not have to be a world superpower, It can be efficiently managed as a much smaller country that has entrepreneurial citizens that support it's foundation. Everything depends on the players themselves and how they decide to shape the political map of the game.

Work for the good of your country and see it rise to an empire.

Activities in this game are divided into several modules. First is the economy as a citizen in a country of your choice you must work to earn money, which you will get to spend for example, on food or purchase of weapons which are critical for your progress as a fighter. You will work in either private companies which are owned by players or government companies which are owned by the state. After progressing in the game you will finally get the opportunity to set up your own business and hire other players. If it prospers, we can even change it into a joint-stock company and enter the stock market and get even more money in this way.


In E-Sim, international wars are nothing out of the ordinary.

"E-Sim is one of the most unique browser games out there"

Become an influential politician.

The second module is a politics. Just like in real life politics in E-Sim are an extremely powerful tool that can be used for your own purposes. From time to time there are elections in the game in which you will not only vote, but also have the ability to run for the head of the party you're in. You can also apply for congress, where once elected you will be given the right to vote on laws proposed by your fellow congress members or your president and propose laws yourself. Voting on laws is important for your country as it can shape the lives of those around you. You can also try to become the head of a given party, and even take part in presidential elections and decide on the shape of the foreign policy of a given state (for example, who to declare war on). Career in politics is obviously not easy and in order to succeed in it, you have to have a good plan and compete for the votes of voters.


You can go bankrupt or become a rich man while playing the stock market.

The international war.

The last and probably the most important module is military. In E-Sim, countries are constantly fighting each other for control over territories which in return grant them access to more valuable raw materials. For this purpose, they form alliances, they fight international wars, but they also have to deal with, for example, uprisings in conquered countries or civil wars, which may explode on their territory. You can also take part in these clashes, although you are also given the opportunity to lead a life as a pacifist who focuses on other activities in the game (for example, running a successful newspaper or selling products).


At the auction you can sell or buy your dream inventory.

E-Sim is a unique browser game. It's creators ensured realistic representation of the mechanisms present in the real world and gave all power to the players who shape the image of the virtual Earth according to their own. So come and join them and help your country achieve its full potential.


Invest, produce and sell - be an entrepreneur in E-Sim.


Take part in numerous events for the E-Sim community.


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