Esim - 5.30
Login:
Password:

Forgot password Register

Article


7
   
Report


一萌妹子开车遇到警察叔叔查酒驾,突然慌了神。

警察叔叔:“喝酒没?”
萌妹子:“没……没有!”
警察叔叔:“没喝怎么说话都结巴了,下车吹一下!”
萌妹子:“警察叔叔,我真的就喝了一罐王老五啊!”
警察叔叔:“看样子你醉得不轻啊,下车到医院做一下抽血检验!”
就这样萌妹子被带走了,结果萌妹子被带走时大喊:“我真只是喝了那个正宗好凉茶 正宗好声音凉茶领导品牌,中国销量遥遥领先的红罐凉茶王老五啊!”
警察叔叔阴险一笑道:“还想蒙我,那是加多宝!”

女汉子最近刚买一辆车,周末开车出去兜风,结果刚走一半车就熄火,再怎么也打不着了。女汉子一怒之下跑到4S店,揪过来店员就是劈头盖脸一顿骂,直骂的天昏地暗、飞沙走石、日月无光、地动山摇,足足骂了一个多小时。
然后4S店销售经理经理拍拍女汉子肩膀,轻声说:“姐姐,你的车没油了!”
女汉子:“……”

一个孩子问大师:请你告诉我,知识装在哪里?
大师也没有想过这个问题,小声地说:在大脑里吧!
孩子说:不对,数学老师骂我脑子笨。
大师笑了:那就在肚子里。
孩子说:也不对,语文老师说我肚子里没有墨水。

一女同事刚休完产假回到公司,一个男同事屁颠屁颠的跑过来,手里递过来一杯咖啡!女同事受宠若惊呀,连忙说:“我现在是哺乳期,不能喝咖啡!” 男同事神回复:“不是让你喝,就是想让你给我加点奶!” 办公室一片寂静!

早上一睁眼我就冲老婆吼:“是不是今天还得我刷碗?”她说:“是。”又问:“这个月零花钱没了是不是不再给了?”她说:“是。”再问:“是不是你说啥我都得听?”她答:“是。”老婆对我连半个“不”字都不敢说,让我每天好心情。

有个记性不好的媳妇儿真是叫人头疼:上午把口红蹭我衣服上,刚吃完午饭我就挨揍了。


通知:因为今年5月30日是星期六,不开市,所以今年的股灾日提前到5月28日了。2007年5月30日是阴历4月11日,2015年5月28日也是阴历4月11日,这次我们玩阴的! 给您带来的不便敬请谅解!—— 《中国股灾委员会》 2015年5月28日




Previous article:
欧盟向各成员国强行摊派4万难民 (10 years ago)

Next article:
一个截访干部的忏悔录1 (10 years ago)

ESim
or
Register for free:
Only letters, numbers, underscore and space are allowed (A-Z,a-z,0-9,_,' ')
Show more

By clicking 'Sign Up!', you agree to the Rules and that you have read the Privacy Policy.

About the game:


USA as a world power? In E-Sim it is possible!

In E-Sim we have a huge, living world, which is a mirror copy of the Earth. Well, maybe not completely mirrored, because the balance of power in this virtual world looks a bit different than in real life. In E-Sim, USA does not have to be a world superpower, It can be efficiently managed as a much smaller country that has entrepreneurial citizens that support it's foundation. Everything depends on the players themselves and how they decide to shape the political map of the game.

Work for the good of your country and see it rise to an empire.

Activities in this game are divided into several modules. First is the economy as a citizen in a country of your choice you must work to earn money, which you will get to spend for example, on food or purchase of weapons which are critical for your progress as a fighter. You will work in either private companies which are owned by players or government companies which are owned by the state. After progressing in the game you will finally get the opportunity to set up your own business and hire other players. If it prospers, we can even change it into a joint-stock company and enter the stock market and get even more money in this way.


In E-Sim, international wars are nothing out of the ordinary.

"E-Sim is one of the most unique browser games out there"

Become an influential politician.

The second module is a politics. Just like in real life politics in E-Sim are an extremely powerful tool that can be used for your own purposes. From time to time there are elections in the game in which you will not only vote, but also have the ability to run for the head of the party you're in. You can also apply for congress, where once elected you will be given the right to vote on laws proposed by your fellow congress members or your president and propose laws yourself. Voting on laws is important for your country as it can shape the lives of those around you. You can also try to become the head of a given party, and even take part in presidential elections and decide on the shape of the foreign policy of a given state (for example, who to declare war on). Career in politics is obviously not easy and in order to succeed in it, you have to have a good plan and compete for the votes of voters.


You can go bankrupt or become a rich man while playing the stock market.

The international war.

The last and probably the most important module is military. In E-Sim, countries are constantly fighting each other for control over territories which in return grant them access to more valuable raw materials. For this purpose, they form alliances, they fight international wars, but they also have to deal with, for example, uprisings in conquered countries or civil wars, which may explode on their territory. You can also take part in these clashes, although you are also given the opportunity to lead a life as a pacifist who focuses on other activities in the game (for example, running a successful newspaper or selling products).


At the auction you can sell or buy your dream inventory.

E-Sim is a unique browser game. It's creators ensured realistic representation of the mechanisms present in the real world and gave all power to the players who shape the image of the virtual Earth according to their own. So come and join them and help your country achieve its full potential.


Invest, produce and sell - be an entrepreneur in E-Sim.


Take part in numerous events for the E-Sim community.


| Terms of Service | Privacy policy | Support | Alpha | Luxia | Primera | Secura | Suna | Sora | Magna | Pangea | e-Sim: Countryballs Country Game
PLAY ON