Article
Pošta Slovenije obvešča, da bo iz prodaje takoj umaknila znamke s
podobo predsednika vlade Janeza Janše. Kot razlog navajajo dejstvo, da znamke vse bolj odpadajo s kuvert in razglednic. Po natančnem pregledu vzroka so v Pošti Slovenije ugotovili, da ljudje pljuvajo na napačno stran znamke.
Zakaj se črnogorci ne vozijo po avtocesti Maribor-Ljubljana?
Ker je vmes postajališče LOPATA!!!
V norišnici se norec odloči napraviti samomor. Skoči v jezero, vendar ga pogumno reši njegov sonorec.
Čez nekaj ur kličejo rešitelja k direktorju: "Žal vam moram povedati, da smo vašega prijatelja našli mrtvega. Po tistem, ko ste ga rešili iz jezera, se je obesil."
Rešitelj pa: "Jaz sem ga obesil, da bi se posušil."
-What did the penis say to the condom?
-Cover me, im going in!
Pride hčerka naga v dnevno sobo, vidi jo mater:
Mati:Ka pa je teb da prideš naga v dnevno sobo?!
Hči: Joj mami, to je ta pižama 21. stoletja
(si mater misli ajd, nej bo)
Drug večer, hčerka spet naga v dnevni sobi:
Mati:Ka pa je teb da prideš naga v dnevno sobo?!
Hči: Joj mami, to je ta pižama 21. stoletja
Mati: (pa pizda, bom pa še js probala tole pižamo 21. stoletja)
Tretji večer, mati naga v dnevni sobi, vidi jo oče:
Oče: Žena?! Ka pa je stabo da si naga tuki?!
Mati: Ja, to je pižama 21. stoletja
Oče: (gleda: O_o) Pa, a nebi ti tele pižame mal zlikala?
Gredo trije pijanci po železnici.
Prvi rece: "Tu je pa ograja zelo nizka..."
Drugi ga prekine: "Ja, pa stopnice so tudi prevec na ozko."
Tretji odgovori: "Fanta, ne skrbita, lift že gre..."
Zakaj vegetarijanke ne kričijo med seksom?
Ker nočejo priznati, da jim lahko da kos mesa takšen užitek
Žena (histerično): ˝Boljše bi bilo, če bi se poročila s hudičem!˝
Mož (mirno): ˝Žal mi je draga, ampak poroke med sorodniki so danes strogo prepovedane.˝
Ujame narkoman zlato ribico. Pa tak ko smo že navajeni ribica reče, da mu izpolni 3 želje. pa reče narkoman: želim da bi dala vse Ruse v Kitajsto.
Ribica ga mal čudno gleda , pa reče : OK naj ti bo vsi Rusi v Kitajsko. povej drugo željo.
Narkoman reče: Želim, da bi bli vsi Kitajci v Rusiji.
Ribica ga še bol čudno gleda, vendar ji ne preostane drugega kot da izpolni željo in vpraša še za tretjo željo.
pa reče narkoman: Želim si da bi dala vse Ruse v Rusijo in vse Kitajce v Kitajsko.
pa ribici nič ni jasno, sam izpolni željo. potem pa še reče: Prej ko me izpustiš povej zakaj take želje ?
Pa reče narkoman : sam da dugaja
Dve stari mamci se pogovarjata na razstavi cvetja. Pa reče prva: 'Pizda je
dolgčas, nič se ne dogaja'.
Pa reče druga: 'Ma za pet dolarjev bi se slekla in odlaufala en krog po
razstavi, bi se saj neki dogajal'.
Pa reče prva: 'Evo ti pet dolarjev'.
Vzame druga pet dolarjev, se sleče in odlaufa iz šotora. Čez nekaj minut se
sliši gromozanski aplavz. Prva tastara posluša in ji nič ni jasno.Čez nekaj
časa pride druga nazaj v šotor in jo prva vpraša: 'Kva pa je blo? A so teb
ploskal?'
'Ja men so ploskal ja, pi*** jim materina, dobila sem nagrado za najboljšo
ikebano iz posušenega cvetja'.
Žaga Mujo se gre šolat za gozdarja. Gozdar mu da žago in reče naj gre sekat drevesa. Mujo gre in ob koncu dneva ga gozdar vpraša koliko dreves je posekal. Mujo reče 210 dreves. Gozdar reče da je premalo. Isto je drugi dan na koncu pa mujo reče naj poseka on eno drevo. Gozdar prižge motorno žago in podre eno drevo. Mujo pa reče a to se pržge.
Gre blondinka pozimi na ribolov. V led zvrta luknjo in hoče začeti, ko z neba zasliši glas: “Tukaj ni rib.”Odide malo naprej, ponovno izvrta luknjo, da bo začela loviti in spet z neba: “Tukaj ni rib.”Ker gre v tretje rado, se odloči, da bo poskusila se na drugi strani ledene ploskve.
Izbere primeren kraj, zvrta luknjo, pripravi palico, skoraj vrže…
Z neba zadoni: “Pravim ti, da tukaj ni rib.”
Blondinki je prekipelo. Zadere se nazaj: “Kdo mi to govori, da tuki not ni rib? A si bog, al kdo me prepričuje, da ni rib?”
Z neba se zasliši: “Ne, jaz sem napovedovalec v hokejski dvorani in pusti led pri miru.”
Poleg psihiatrične bolnišnice kmet orje njivo. Kaj kmalu vidi bolnika na balkonu, ki hoče pobegniti.
Kmet si reče: ‘Ojoj če me tale dobi me ubije’. Tako je bolnik ubežal in začel loviti kmeta. Lovila sta se zelo dolgo. Nato pa se kmet nasloni na drevo in reče: ‘Eh, meni je vseeno. Pa naj me kar ubije’. Bolnik pa priteče do njega, se ga dotakne in mu reče: ‘Ti loviš’,in začne bežati.
Pride sin domov,
oče: ki si hodo tak dolgo!!
sin: malo smo igrali nogomet z prijatli,
oče: daj sem roko, povohe ga vseče okrog uhe pa reče pubec nea laži bil si pri micki
sin si misli pi**a stara kak te veš kje sm bil pa dobo pozabi,
čez par dni sin spet pride malo pozneje pa ga fotr spet vpraša: pubec kje si bil!!!
sin: ma z kolegom na pivu.
oče: daj sem roko spet povoha ga mahne da se mu kr zblodi nea mi laži šmrkavec zaj že hodiš k pepci
sin si misli pizda stara vse veš al kaj ju3 te pa bom za**kal,
naslednji dan sin pije z prijatli ko se vrača domov pa zavije v štalo pa potisne 3 prste v kozjo pizdo pride domov
oče spet isto kje si bil... daj sem roko in voh voha voha nakar reče stara daj prinesi mi palco pa klobuk nova kurva ja v vasi.
Upam da ste uživali, ob branju in gledanju slik
Previous article:
Fun 2 (14 years ago)
Next article:
Fun 4 (14 years ago)
About the game:
USA as a world power? In E-Sim it is possible!
In E-Sim we have a huge, living world, which is a mirror copy of the Earth. Well, maybe not completely mirrored, because the balance of power in this virtual world looks a bit different than in real life. In E-Sim, USA does not have to be a world superpower, It can be efficiently managed as a much smaller country that has entrepreneurial citizens that support it's foundation. Everything depends on the players themselves and how they decide to shape the political map of the game.
Work for the good of your country and see it rise to an empire.
Activities in this game are divided into several modules. First is the economy as a citizen in a country of your choice you must work to earn money, which you will get to spend for example, on food or purchase of weapons which are critical for your progress as a fighter. You will work in either private companies which are owned by players or government companies which are owned by the state. After progressing in the game you will finally get the opportunity to set up your own business and hire other players. If it prospers, we can even change it into a joint-stock company and enter the stock market and get even more money in this way.
In E-Sim, international wars are nothing out of the ordinary.
Become an influential politician.
The second module is a politics. Just like in real life politics in E-Sim are an extremely powerful tool that can be used for your own purposes. From time to time there are elections in the game in which you will not only vote, but also have the ability to run for the head of the party you're in. You can also apply for congress, where once elected you will be given the right to vote on laws proposed by your fellow congress members or your president and propose laws yourself. Voting on laws is important for your country as it can shape the lives of those around you. You can also try to become the head of a given party, and even take part in presidential elections and decide on the shape of the foreign policy of a given state (for example, who to declare war on). Career in politics is obviously not easy and in order to succeed in it, you have to have a good plan and compete for the votes of voters.
You can go bankrupt or become a rich man while playing the stock market.
The international war.
The last and probably the most important module is military. In E-Sim, countries are constantly fighting each other for control over territories which in return grant them access to more valuable raw materials. For this purpose, they form alliances, they fight international wars, but they also have to deal with, for example, uprisings in conquered countries or civil wars, which may explode on their territory. You can also take part in these clashes, although you are also given the opportunity to lead a life as a pacifist who focuses on other activities in the game (for example, running a successful newspaper or selling products).
At the auction you can sell or buy your dream inventory.
E-Sim is a unique browser game. It's creators ensured realistic representation of the mechanisms present in the real world and gave all power to the players who shape the image of the virtual Earth according to their own. So come and join them and help your country achieve its full potential.
Invest, produce and sell - be an entrepreneur in E-Sim.
Take part in numerous events for the E-Sim community.
