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1.老爸八个兄弟,住一个大院,就前两天老爸批发一小货车西瓜,准备去卖,结果三天就吃完了。。。


2.今天我妈跟我说,好像快到情人节了,你约不约会啊?我就楞了,我说我跟谁约呀,她说哦,那你要是不出去玩那天就看家吧,我跟你爸出去。。


3.刚才给老爸一块奥利奥,老爸边吃边说这是啥,我说“奥利奥”,老爸说奥利奥是啥,我说你没看广告么,先扭一扭再舔一舔再泡一泡,老爸瞬间惊恐状,说“啊,我已经咽下去了怎么办”

4.你们能想象补课分班和一个成绩好的同名人到一个班里。最后点名确认,我是多余的,在然后大家惊奇的目光下,我把桌子从重点班搬到了普通班的苦逼心情骂?

5.毕业两年了,刚刚接到花旗银行的电话:“您2010年申请的花旗银行奖学金已经通过审批,将于三个工作日内发放。”这跟在路边捡到一万二千块有区别吗?


6.诺基亚当初认为苹果iPhone构不成威胁的原因是太贵且未能通过基本抗摔测试。但让他们没想到的是:如果把手机做的特别贵,一般人就不舍得摔了……


7.今天等公交车,等到心都碎了,好不容易来了一辆,竟然不停车!只好一边走一边拦的士,感谢天感谢地等来了一辆,坐上车打开钱包,才发现昨晚交房租,钱包里只剩7块钱了!三亚的士起步价是8元,我看了看体型彪悍的开车大哥,顿时冷汗直流。停车时候我心惊胆战地说,大哥,我钱不够还缺1块。大哥摇摇手说,算了没事。我急忙从包包里拿出一包麦片塞给他说,这个送你,以后你需要帮助的时候你拿着这个麦片找我,我一定会为你赴汤蹈火!


8.三个人去吃火锅,对服务员说,拿3罐王老吉。服务员说,只有加多宝。我说,加多宝不就是王老吉么?服务员说,你可以这么理解,但是,你知道它是王老吉但你不能这么叫了,我也不能这么说……


9.前几天去舅舅家玩,晚上就和表弟睡一起。我们俩背靠背睡觉。夜深了。突然感觉表弟啊一阵抽动。有时候还猛烈抽动。哥那个汗啊。表弟才7岁啊。我实际忍不住。把他从被窝逮出来。尼玛竟然在用我的手机切水果。。。


10.不割,女友提前通知七夕我自己过,因为她要打游戏,那天双倍经验

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About the game:


USA as a world power? In E-Sim it is possible!

In E-Sim we have a huge, living world, which is a mirror copy of the Earth. Well, maybe not completely mirrored, because the balance of power in this virtual world looks a bit different than in real life. In E-Sim, USA does not have to be a world superpower, It can be efficiently managed as a much smaller country that has entrepreneurial citizens that support it's foundation. Everything depends on the players themselves and how they decide to shape the political map of the game.

Work for the good of your country and see it rise to an empire.

Activities in this game are divided into several modules. First is the economy as a citizen in a country of your choice you must work to earn money, which you will get to spend for example, on food or purchase of weapons which are critical for your progress as a fighter. You will work in either private companies which are owned by players or government companies which are owned by the state. After progressing in the game you will finally get the opportunity to set up your own business and hire other players. If it prospers, we can even change it into a joint-stock company and enter the stock market and get even more money in this way.


In E-Sim, international wars are nothing out of the ordinary.

"E-Sim is one of the most unique browser games out there"

Become an influential politician.

The second module is a politics. Just like in real life politics in E-Sim are an extremely powerful tool that can be used for your own purposes. From time to time there are elections in the game in which you will not only vote, but also have the ability to run for the head of the party you're in. You can also apply for congress, where once elected you will be given the right to vote on laws proposed by your fellow congress members or your president and propose laws yourself. Voting on laws is important for your country as it can shape the lives of those around you. You can also try to become the head of a given party, and even take part in presidential elections and decide on the shape of the foreign policy of a given state (for example, who to declare war on). Career in politics is obviously not easy and in order to succeed in it, you have to have a good plan and compete for the votes of voters.


You can go bankrupt or become a rich man while playing the stock market.

The international war.

The last and probably the most important module is military. In E-Sim, countries are constantly fighting each other for control over territories which in return grant them access to more valuable raw materials. For this purpose, they form alliances, they fight international wars, but they also have to deal with, for example, uprisings in conquered countries or civil wars, which may explode on their territory. You can also take part in these clashes, although you are also given the opportunity to lead a life as a pacifist who focuses on other activities in the game (for example, running a successful newspaper or selling products).


At the auction you can sell or buy your dream inventory.

E-Sim is a unique browser game. It's creators ensured realistic representation of the mechanisms present in the real world and gave all power to the players who shape the image of the virtual Earth according to their own. So come and join them and help your country achieve its full potential.


Invest, produce and sell - be an entrepreneur in E-Sim.


Take part in numerous events for the E-Sim community.


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