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转自兔吧，原作者：sqhdio 原帖地址：http://tieba.baidu.com/p/2544419212?see_lz=1
最近几年围绕崛起的兔子，周边地区热度不断上升，搅合成一锅粥。就这一话题兔吧里、QQ群里已经吐槽了一百遍啊一百遍……这两天突发奇想准备把自己的理解整理了发一下~
现在我觉得我当时肯定是疯了，怎么会掉进这么大一个坑的呢……怎么会……，
（一） 北棒
首先，我第一个能想到的就是世界上最给力的富二代人造人十九号金三胖（咳咳~）。
自从金二胖驾鹤西归之后，金三胖就跟打了鸡血一样，一个劲的用他那张肥脸去蹭奥黑的屁股，搞的奥黑都不好意思接他的茬。不知道三胖是留学的时候好莱坞电影看多了还是正处于中二期，对他来说这个世界上只有一个话事人那就是美帝，只要得到美帝的承认，他就是有核国家，他的政权合法性就有了保证。三胖一边关闭开城园区叫嚣着要对南棒发动圣战，一边主动邀约美帝的政经甚至体育界人事到北棒访问。可以说是软硬兼施多管齐下，想逼迫奥黑来跟他做直接的对话，却不曾想到迟迟得不到奥黑的回应。
金三胖唯一没有想到的问题是他宝座底下的这块土地可是兔子用几十万烈士的鲜血换来的自留地，绝对不会让任何人染指。奥黑也不是傻子，再不开眼也不会去触碰兔子的核心利益，对于棒子半岛这块伤心地美帝还不至于好了伤疤忘了疼。退一万步说，北棒问题也只是美帝无数个让他头疼的问题中的一个而已，犯不上为了个中二再刺激兔子不是。
北棒问题说到底就是核蘑菇问题，从金二胖开始拥有自己的蘑菇就是北棒的夙愿，80年代就因为偷偷研究蘑菇跟毛熊闹的不愉快，但毕竟一大批土著的中低层蘑菇技术研究人员已经培养好了（据估计北棒有一两千人的基层蘑菇研究人员）。91年毛熊归天，断了炊的北棒日子越来越不好过，但是北棒对蘑菇的热情依然不减，有条件要造没有条件创造条件也要造，之后连续的爆了好几颗蘑菇，但当量并不令人满意。
大家不要错误的以为北棒是兔子的附属国，北棒从来就不是，以前是倒向毛子，之后就游走在多家势力之间混吃混喝，但跟兔子的关系还算是不错。这一局面随着三胖上台彻底打破了，执政没多久他就废了二胖的托孤重臣，又是舔美帝的屁股，又是挥着拳头吓唬南棒，并进行了第三次核试验。这次三胖的举动彻底触及了兔子的底线，卧榻之侧岂容他人鼾睡，而且那人还是个光头不穿鞋身上纹着带鱼手里攥着蘑菇不要命的主。
586上台后立刻对中二的三胖加大了制裁力度，冻结了北棒在兔子银行里的账户，并停止了原油和粮食等物资供给。三胖很快派来了特使，但几次谈判的结果看来都不理想，毕竟双方的要价相差太大，一边要求半岛无核化，一边希望承认其有核国家地位。到不久前李副相去参加朝鲜战争胜利阅兵式的时候，三胖更是赤裸裸的拿出了核背包，打了兔子一记耳光。三胖的意思就是说，虽然我没有拿得出手的蘑菇，但造一些脏弹的水平还是有的，要是这些脏弹通过特种作战进行渗透，想保住东北和南棒的百分百安全几乎是不可能的。很快，北棒的粮食问题又被再次提及。
自打毛熊的援助断了之后，北棒就没有足够的石油制造化肥，田地的农用机械也趴了窝，那日子甭提多苦逼了，90年代甚至有饿死人的报导。1984年，北棒的粮食年产量曾经达到过900万吨，然而经过连续十多年的经济衰退，到2004年时粮食产量还不到原来的一半。根据联合国粮农组织的报告，北棒有80%的人口处在饥饿当中，可以吃的饱的只有军人和权贵。雪肤豚的报告真实性我不知道，但南棒我还是走过一次的，棒子国那边除了山地就是丘陵，就连不少城市都是依山而建的。我们当时开玩笑说，南棒只有两块平地，一块是机场，一块是球场。对于这个国家的农业来说，半岛这样的地形只能说是一个杯具。
由于粮食紧张北棒提出国家解决三分之一，单位解决三分之一，个人解决三分之一的分配制度。单位条件好的话说不定还能多分到点粮食，如果单位指望不上的话就只有去黑市买走私粮，要不就只有少吃点……咱东北的灰色组织跟北棒的合作由来已久，上次渔船被掳事件跟这也有关，一边扣船一边收钱，然后再互相分账，当然咱拿的是大头，只是那次选择的时机有点不巧。每年通过走私进入北棒的物资比通过正常途径进去的都多，因此原本就算被制裁了北棒的小日子还是过的不错的。兔子之前对于东北的走私业务也就是睁一只眼闭一只眼，毕竟东北的看门狗给块骨头咬咬还是需要的，不过最近兔子严厉打击走私有木有，北棒的黑市粮价暴涨有木有！原来二十二块一公斤的黑市大米涨到了三十八块（这还是良心价），差不多顶北棒人均两个月的工资收入。今年又碰上严重的水灾，甚至有北棒开始发放军粮的报导。
不要以为北棒不要粮食要蘑菇是为了什么统一半岛的伟大理想，三胖要大流氓们承认他是有核国家只是为了他屁股底下那张还没坐热的椅子。金三胖可能是想复制当年兔子的崛起，在世界几大势力之中左右逢源，他不明白为什么迎接他的只有制裁和更加严厉的制裁。他却不知道只有拥有兔子这么大的实力可能去撼动对抗世界的平衡才会受到各方的青睐，而他在世界大流氓的手里只是一颗被摆布的棋子。
当然我还是认为，有了脏弹的北棒已经不可能从外部进行攻击，那就只有加大内部的压力。兔子会一如既往的勒紧三胖的裤腰带帮他减减肥，希望北棒把更多的资源投入到制造蘑菇之外的领域去，放慢蘑菇的研发速度，理想的话制造一次北棒版的颜色革命也不是不可以。不要忘记兔子手里还有一张牌，那就是二胖的嫡长子金正男，北宋钦宗即视感有木有，南宋高宗即视感有木有！虽说这厮非常不成器，还特爱赌博，长的那叫一个满脸横肉，但要用来立傀儡政府也是可以的嘛，不是传说北棒必须由金家的血脉继承嘛。
自古以来，废长立幼取祸之道也！
欲知后事如何，且听下回分解——（二） 南棒
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About the game:
USA as a world power? In E-Sim it is possible!
In E-Sim we have a huge, living world, which is a mirror copy of the Earth. Well, maybe not completely mirrored, because the balance of power in this virtual world looks a bit different than in real life. In E-Sim, USA does not have to be a world superpower, It can be efficiently managed as a much smaller country that has entrepreneurial citizens that support it's foundation. Everything depends on the players themselves and how they decide to shape the political map of the game.
Work for the good of your country and see it rise to an empire.
Activities in this game are divided into several modules. First is the economy as a citizen in a country of your choice you must work to earn money, which you will get to spend for example, on food or purchase of weapons which are critical for your progress as a fighter. You will work in either private companies which are owned by players or government companies which are owned by the state. After progressing in the game you will finally get the opportunity to set up your own business and hire other players. If it prospers, we can even change it into a joint-stock company and enter the stock market and get even more money in this way.
In E-Sim, international wars are nothing out of the ordinary.
Become an influential politician.
The second module is a politics. Just like in real life politics in E-Sim are an extremely powerful tool that can be used for your own purposes. From time to time there are elections in the game in which you will not only vote, but also have the ability to run for the head of the party you're in. You can also apply for congress, where once elected you will be given the right to vote on laws proposed by your fellow congress members or your president and propose laws yourself. Voting on laws is important for your country as it can shape the lives of those around you. You can also try to become the head of a given party, and even take part in presidential elections and decide on the shape of the foreign policy of a given state (for example, who to declare war on). Career in politics is obviously not easy and in order to succeed in it, you have to have a good plan and compete for the votes of voters.
You can go bankrupt or become a rich man while playing the stock market.
The international war.
The last and probably the most important module is military. In E-Sim, countries are constantly fighting each other for control over territories which in return grant them access to more valuable raw materials. For this purpose, they form alliances, they fight international wars, but they also have to deal with, for example, uprisings in conquered countries or civil wars, which may explode on their territory. You can also take part in these clashes, although you are also given the opportunity to lead a life as a pacifist who focuses on other activities in the game (for example, running a successful newspaper or selling products).
At the auction you can sell or buy your dream inventory.
E-Sim is a unique browser game. It's creators ensured realistic representation of the mechanisms present in the real world and gave all power to the players who shape the image of the virtual Earth according to their own. So come and join them and help your country achieve its full potential.
Invest, produce and sell - be an entrepreneur in E-Sim.
Take part in numerous events for the E-Sim community.
