Article
*Guava Tree
PADRE: (nakita ang bata na walang panty habang umakyat sa itaas ng bayabas) ohh..my god…(naka krus) oi ning bumaba ka nga diyan sa itaas ng bayabas, baka ka mahulog
BATA: (bumaba) Bakit po padre may nagawa po ba akong kasalanan?
PADRE: (may binigay sa bata) Wala namn ining, e2 nga palang 10 pesos, pambili ng panty
BATA: (masayang-masayang umuwi sa bahay)
NANAY: (nagtanong sa anak) Oi..bat masaya ang anak ko?
BATA: (masayang-masaya) Nay alam mo binigyan po ako ng pera ni padre
NANAY: Ba’t naman ka binigyan ng pera ni padre?
BATA: Eh wan ko inay, ang sabi niya pambili ng panty. nakita kasi niya ako umakyat sa itaas ng bayabas na walang panty
NANAY: (nakapag-isip isip) talaga anak!
BATA: Opo nay.
(ilang minuto ang nakalipas...)
NANAY: (umakyat sa bayabas at nakita ni padre)
PADRE: Hesus maryusip (nagcross ) hesus maryusip.
PADRE: Oi iha bumaba ka nga sa itaas ng bayabas.
NANAY: (happy) Bakit po padre, bibigyan din niyo po ako ng pera?
PADRE: E2ng BLADE. Mag-ahit ka..!!!
HAHAHAHAHA
*Miss Universe Contestants
PARE 1: Pare parang malalim ang iniisip mo!
PARE 2: Nanaginip ako kagabi kasama ko 50 contestants ng Ms. Universe.
PARE 1: Swerte mo! Anong problema mo?
PARE 2: Pare ako nanalo!
HAHAHAHAHA
*Sexy Poem
Oh, ano tung nararamdaman ko.
Hindi ko alam kung san tutungo.
At nang ika'y makita.
Ako'y natuwa.
Agad akong nag hubad.
At sayo'y pumatong ng dahan-dhan.
Lahat ng posisyon ay aking ginawa.
Ako'y lubhang pinawisan at nahirapan.
At sa di katagalan ako'y nilabasan.
Oohh! ang sarap talaga pag-nakapatong.
Sau oh mahal kong...
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INIDORO
HAHAHAHAHHAHA
*Malandi Daw
RAPE SCENE:
BABAE: Tulong! Tulong!
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RAPIST: Wag ka ng humingi ng tulong, kaya ko na tong mag-isa! Malandi ka ha, gusto mo pang marami kami! ^^
HAHAHAHHAHAHHA
*Favoritism
TEACHER: Pedro 1 + 3?
PEDRO: Maam 4 po.
TEACHER: Oh ikaw Juan. 3+ 1?
JUAN: Ayan na! Ayan na! Langya... pag mahirap akin...! FAVORITISM....!
HAHAHAHAHAHHAHA
*Common Sense
*Isang bata, nagpasa ng blank paper sa art teacher...*
TEACHER: Bakit blank ang work mo?
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BATA: Nagdrawing po ako ng baka at damo.
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TEACHER: (Tinignan ulit ang papel) San ang damo?
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BATA: Ubos na po,kinain ng baka.
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TEACHER: (Kamot sa ulo) Eh nasaan yong baka?
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BATA: Ano pa gagawin ng baka dyan, eh wala ng damo?
syempre umalis na po.
Common sense naman mam!
HAHAHHAHHA
*Payabangan Sa Jeep
GIRL: Bayad…
DRIVER: Ilan tong 50?
GIRL: Isa lang kuya, Estudyante, Nursing sa Ateneo, Kasasakay lang
BOY: (Nayabangan. Nagbayad ng 500) Manong Bayad..
DRIVER: (Galit) Ilan tong 500?
BOY: 1 lang, Keep the change. Seaman, Kadarating lang.
SIRA ULO: (Tumawa, Inabot ang 1000) Manong Bayad…
DRIVER: (Galit na galit) Peste! Ilan tong 1000?
SIRA ULO: Tatlo, Isama ang Nurse at Seaman. Keep the change. Galing Mental kalalabas lang.
ohahhh?? whahaah
HAHAHAHAHAHAH
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HAHAHA VOTE AND SUBSCRIBE KUNG NATAWA KAYO ! ....
PAMPAWALA NG STRESS xD
P.S. mag ingat sa SUPERFRIENDS..
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Allies Again (12 years ago)
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An Interview with the Philippine President (12 years ago)
About the game:
USA as a world power? In E-Sim it is possible!
In E-Sim we have a huge, living world, which is a mirror copy of the Earth. Well, maybe not completely mirrored, because the balance of power in this virtual world looks a bit different than in real life. In E-Sim, USA does not have to be a world superpower, It can be efficiently managed as a much smaller country that has entrepreneurial citizens that support it's foundation. Everything depends on the players themselves and how they decide to shape the political map of the game.
Work for the good of your country and see it rise to an empire.
Activities in this game are divided into several modules. First is the economy as a citizen in a country of your choice you must work to earn money, which you will get to spend for example, on food or purchase of weapons which are critical for your progress as a fighter. You will work in either private companies which are owned by players or government companies which are owned by the state. After progressing in the game you will finally get the opportunity to set up your own business and hire other players. If it prospers, we can even change it into a joint-stock company and enter the stock market and get even more money in this way.
In E-Sim, international wars are nothing out of the ordinary.
Become an influential politician.
The second module is a politics. Just like in real life politics in E-Sim are an extremely powerful tool that can be used for your own purposes. From time to time there are elections in the game in which you will not only vote, but also have the ability to run for the head of the party you're in. You can also apply for congress, where once elected you will be given the right to vote on laws proposed by your fellow congress members or your president and propose laws yourself. Voting on laws is important for your country as it can shape the lives of those around you. You can also try to become the head of a given party, and even take part in presidential elections and decide on the shape of the foreign policy of a given state (for example, who to declare war on). Career in politics is obviously not easy and in order to succeed in it, you have to have a good plan and compete for the votes of voters.
You can go bankrupt or become a rich man while playing the stock market.
The international war.
The last and probably the most important module is military. In E-Sim, countries are constantly fighting each other for control over territories which in return grant them access to more valuable raw materials. For this purpose, they form alliances, they fight international wars, but they also have to deal with, for example, uprisings in conquered countries or civil wars, which may explode on their territory. You can also take part in these clashes, although you are also given the opportunity to lead a life as a pacifist who focuses on other activities in the game (for example, running a successful newspaper or selling products).
At the auction you can sell or buy your dream inventory.
E-Sim is a unique browser game. It's creators ensured realistic representation of the mechanisms present in the real world and gave all power to the players who shape the image of the virtual Earth according to their own. So come and join them and help your country achieve its full potential.
Invest, produce and sell - be an entrepreneur in E-Sim.
Take part in numerous events for the E-Sim community.
