Article
DEMOKRACIJA
“Ati, kaj je to demokracija?”
“To je sistem, v katerem dve budali preglasujeta enega pametnega.”
V PARLAMENTU
V slovenskem parlamentu zazvoni telefon.
Dvigne pleskar, ki renovira sejno sobo:
»Danes ni tukaj nikogar. Danes delamo!«
O,O
Janša in Peterle sta skupaj na predvolilnem zboru.
Peterle vzame v roke list, se prikloni in začne brati:
»O, o!«
In spet: »O, o!«
Pa še: »O!«
Tedaj se nestrpno oglasi Janša: »Za božjo voljo, Lojze, olimpijske kroge pusti pri miru, pravo besedilo je pod njimi.«
STRANKA
Košir: »Si že slišal, da je predsednik Lojze zapustil svojo stranko?«
Jurij: »Kakšna nesreča! Kaj se je pa zgodilo v stranki?«
Košir: »Zdaj se je že umirilo. Na začetku so pa vsi noreli od veselja!«
2 ČRVA
Se dva črva pogovarjata.
Pa eden vpraša drugega:zakaj si pa ti tako srečen danes?
Pa odvrne drugi:Tašča je odšla na ribolov.
BISERI
Tašča gospoda Novaka je na počitnicah v Španiji utonila.
Čez dve leti je obalna straža našla truplo in poslala gospodu Novaku naslednji telegram: Našli mamo vaše žene, pokrito s školjkami, biseri so vredni 500.000,00 EUR.
Gospod Novak telegrafira nazaj:
Prodajte bisere, pošljite denar in znova nastavite vabo!
KOŠARKA
Zakaj blondinka zadane s trojke?
Ker meče na jajčka.
ROP BANKE
Kaj pije blondinka, potem ko je oropala banko?
Čaj proti zaprtju.
POSTAVA
Katera deklica v prvem razredu osnovne šole ima najlepšo postavo: blondinka, črnolasa ali rjavolaska? Blondinka, ker je stara 18 let!
JOGURT
Peter je vprašal blondinko, kakšna je razlika med jogurtom in spermo.
“Ne vem” je rekla blondinka.
“Potem pa poskusi jogurt!”
SKLANJATEV
V šoli se Janezek uči sklanjatve. Učiteljica ga vpraša:’kako se sklanja dedek?’ Janezek:’ ja… brez kozmodiska težko’.
VOTE&SUB
UPAM,DA SO VAM BILI VICI SMEŠNI.KATERIKOLE ZAMISLI ZA MOJ ČASOPIS MI POŠLITE PO SPROČILU.
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About the game:
USA as a world power? In E-Sim it is possible!
In E-Sim we have a huge, living world, which is a mirror copy of the Earth. Well, maybe not completely mirrored, because the balance of power in this virtual world looks a bit different than in real life. In E-Sim, USA does not have to be a world superpower, It can be efficiently managed as a much smaller country that has entrepreneurial citizens that support it's foundation. Everything depends on the players themselves and how they decide to shape the political map of the game.
Work for the good of your country and see it rise to an empire.
Activities in this game are divided into several modules. First is the economy as a citizen in a country of your choice you must work to earn money, which you will get to spend for example, on food or purchase of weapons which are critical for your progress as a fighter. You will work in either private companies which are owned by players or government companies which are owned by the state. After progressing in the game you will finally get the opportunity to set up your own business and hire other players. If it prospers, we can even change it into a joint-stock company and enter the stock market and get even more money in this way.
In E-Sim, international wars are nothing out of the ordinary.
Become an influential politician.
The second module is a politics. Just like in real life politics in E-Sim are an extremely powerful tool that can be used for your own purposes. From time to time there are elections in the game in which you will not only vote, but also have the ability to run for the head of the party you're in. You can also apply for congress, where once elected you will be given the right to vote on laws proposed by your fellow congress members or your president and propose laws yourself. Voting on laws is important for your country as it can shape the lives of those around you. You can also try to become the head of a given party, and even take part in presidential elections and decide on the shape of the foreign policy of a given state (for example, who to declare war on). Career in politics is obviously not easy and in order to succeed in it, you have to have a good plan and compete for the votes of voters.
You can go bankrupt or become a rich man while playing the stock market.
The international war.
The last and probably the most important module is military. In E-Sim, countries are constantly fighting each other for control over territories which in return grant them access to more valuable raw materials. For this purpose, they form alliances, they fight international wars, but they also have to deal with, for example, uprisings in conquered countries or civil wars, which may explode on their territory. You can also take part in these clashes, although you are also given the opportunity to lead a life as a pacifist who focuses on other activities in the game (for example, running a successful newspaper or selling products).
At the auction you can sell or buy your dream inventory.
E-Sim is a unique browser game. It's creators ensured realistic representation of the mechanisms present in the real world and gave all power to the players who shape the image of the virtual Earth according to their own. So come and join them and help your country achieve its full potential.
Invest, produce and sell - be an entrepreneur in E-Sim.
Take part in numerous events for the E-Sim community.
