Login:
Password:

Forgot password Register

Article


9
   
Report


1、老师:小明,你平时在家喜欢看电视吗?
  小明:喜欢。
  老师:那有没有你印象深刻、很喜欢的台词啊,给老师分享一下?
  小明:有啊,有啊,就是那句:唉哟喂!大爷,楼上请!新来的姑娘可俊俏呢。。。
  老师:你TM给我滚出去!
 2、小明:老师我变个魔术给你看。
  老师:什么魔术?
  小明:我会让你忘记自己是一条狗。
  老师:我又不是狗。
  小明:你看,忘记了吧。
  老师:滚。。。
  3、老师:波涛汹涌的偏旁都是三点水。小明来举个相似的例子吧。
  小明:馅饼馄饨?
  老师:换一个吧。
  小明:玩玻璃球。
  老师:不好。 ;
  小明:。。。没法洗澡? ;
  老师:有本事来一个六个字的?
  小明:哦吗咪吗咪哄 ;
  老师:来个一百字的!
  小明:哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈。。。
  老师:滚出去!!
  4、小明:老师,老师这道题怎么解啊!
  老师:。。出去。。
  小明:老师。。我现在就想知道!
  老师:。。滚。。!?
  小明:不说就不说嘛!为人师表说脏话!
  老师:滚出去!
  小明无辜地走出了女厕所。
  5、小明上课时一直看着老师傻笑。
  老师:小明你为什么一直对着我笑。
  小明:因为我感冒了。
  老师关心的说:你感冒了还一直笑?吃药了吗?
  小明:就是吃了药才笑啊。
  老师:为什么?
  小明:广告上说药效一整天呢!
  老师:。。。。。
  6、老师:为什么月球表面凹凸不平?
  小明:因为嫦娥在学挖掘机!!
  老师:滚出去!
  7、老师:小明,中学生谈恋爱你怎么看?
  小明:现在的女生一个月换几个男朋友,还说男人骗了他们的感情,骗了他们的心,说世界上的男人都是坏人。
  老师:那你想对这些女生说些什么呢?
  小明:对于这样的女生,我只想说四个字:请联系我!
  老师:你给我滚出去!!!
  8、一天上音乐课,老师:小明你给我唱一首儿歌。
  小明:小白兔白又白,割了动脉割静脉,一动不动真可爱。
  老师一头黑线:换一首。
  小明:两只老虎两只老虎在zuo爱,在zuo爱,两只都是公的两只都是公的,真奇怪真奇怪。
  老师:给我滚出去。
  9、老师:小明,如果你现在很有钱,你最想做什么?
  小明:我想有个家,家里有小倩,白天么么哒,晚上啪啪啪。
  老师:给我滚出去!
  10、老师:小明,你想象一下二十年后老师们相聚的场景。
  小明:我可以唱出来吗?
  老师:可以。
  小明:再过二十年,你们来相会,送到火葬场,全都烧成灰,你一堆,他一堆,谁都不认识谁,统统送到农村当化肥。。。。。。
  小明卒,享年十五。

Previous article:
中国高铁海外第一单风波:墨西哥将补偿中企 允许参与新一轮招标 ... (11 years ago)

Next article:
布鲁塞尔“制服革命”硝烟弥漫 比利时迎来“罢工季” (11 years ago)

ESim
or
Register for free:
Only letters, numbers, underscore and space are allowed (A-Z,a-z,0-9,_,' ')
Show more

By clicking 'Sign Up!', you agree to the Rules and that you have read the Privacy Policy.

About the game:


USA as a world power? In E-Sim it is possible!

In E-Sim we have a huge, living world, which is a mirror copy of the Earth. Well, maybe not completely mirrored, because the balance of power in this virtual world looks a bit different than in real life. In E-Sim, USA does not have to be a world superpower, It can be efficiently managed as a much smaller country that has entrepreneurial citizens that support it's foundation. Everything depends on the players themselves and how they decide to shape the political map of the game.

Work for the good of your country and see it rise to an empire.

Activities in this game are divided into several modules. First is the economy as a citizen in a country of your choice you must work to earn money, which you will get to spend for example, on food or purchase of weapons which are critical for your progress as a fighter. You will work in either private companies which are owned by players or government companies which are owned by the state. After progressing in the game you will finally get the opportunity to set up your own business and hire other players. If it prospers, we can even change it into a joint-stock company and enter the stock market and get even more money in this way.


In E-Sim, international wars are nothing out of the ordinary.

"E-Sim is one of the most unique browser games out there"

Become an influential politician.

The second module is a politics. Just like in real life politics in E-Sim are an extremely powerful tool that can be used for your own purposes. From time to time there are elections in the game in which you will not only vote, but also have the ability to run for the head of the party you're in. You can also apply for congress, where once elected you will be given the right to vote on laws proposed by your fellow congress members or your president and propose laws yourself. Voting on laws is important for your country as it can shape the lives of those around you. You can also try to become the head of a given party, and even take part in presidential elections and decide on the shape of the foreign policy of a given state (for example, who to declare war on). Career in politics is obviously not easy and in order to succeed in it, you have to have a good plan and compete for the votes of voters.


You can go bankrupt or become a rich man while playing the stock market.

The international war.

The last and probably the most important module is military. In E-Sim, countries are constantly fighting each other for control over territories which in return grant them access to more valuable raw materials. For this purpose, they form alliances, they fight international wars, but they also have to deal with, for example, uprisings in conquered countries or civil wars, which may explode on their territory. You can also take part in these clashes, although you are also given the opportunity to lead a life as a pacifist who focuses on other activities in the game (for example, running a successful newspaper or selling products).


At the auction you can sell or buy your dream inventory.

E-Sim is a unique browser game. It's creators ensured realistic representation of the mechanisms present in the real world and gave all power to the players who shape the image of the virtual Earth according to their own. So come and join them and help your country achieve its full potential.


Invest, produce and sell - be an entrepreneur in E-Sim.


Take part in numerous events for the E-Sim community.


| Terms of Service | Privacy policy | Support | Alpha | Luxia | Primera | Secura | Suna | Vexa | Vara | e-Sim: Countryballs Country Game
PLAY ON