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1、小学时候我妈妈慈祥地问我:1+1等于多少呀,我还沉思的时候,我家的狗在旁边懒洋洋地旺旺了两声,这成了我心中永远的痛

2、今天去理发,旁边有一男的陪女盆友去烫头发(背景),烫完后女的问男的好不好看,男的说:别人烫头发显得特别淑女,你烫完后怎么有种腾格尔的感觉。。。。。。

3、和同事出差,他儿子老师给他打电话说他儿子在学校跟人打架了,让他赶紧来学校一趟。可他出差走不开,就在电话里说:老师我现在回不去,等我回去我一定亲手废了他的武功……

4、我弟家小宝,幼儿园老师问:谁愿意当班长啊?每个小朋友都抢着喊自己要当,就我弟家小宝在那光看不出声,老师问:你不想当班长吗?小宝回答:我要当村长。~~~这孩子有前途啊!

5、割!!!!割你妹啊!!今天前女友主动联系我。。。哎哟。我这小心脏受不鸟啊。。高兴的赶紧接了!!!一听声音还真是她!!!然后她说是你吗?我说是啊。怎么想我了。。。她呵呵!!说了句还没女朋友吧!我说对啊对啊。。然后她说活特么该!!就挂了。。。。。。我。。。。。。。。。

6、甲:据说食堂做早餐的大师傅被人打破了头。
乙:这么狠!抄的什么家伙?
甲:食堂卖的包子。
……

7、很小的时候我去医院体检。医生说要验血,我一听哭的哇哇大叫。突然一个比我大不了多少的小朋友问我“你哭什么呀?”我“我要验血 要割手指头!”听完后。那个小朋友比我哭的还惨。我问“你为什么哭?”他说“我要验尿!”

8、大王打算把王位传给太子。

太子问:父王,你做大王做的好好的,干嘛要让位给儿臣。
大王笑了笑,说道:儿呀!你不明白,做大王并不是世界上最爽的。
太子好奇:那做什么最爽?
大王笑得更开心了:哈哈哈哈退位以后我就是老王了。

9、lz妹子……割割……上课睡觉睡迷糊了,以为在家里,把胸罩脱了下来,放在课桌上继续睡,我想全班都醉了吧~T_T~

10、闺密刚跟男友分手,发现自己怀孕了,哭丧的脸问我:如果你跟你男朋友分手了,却发现自己怀孕了怎么办?我说:我会生下来 好好扶养,等到他结婚那天把孩子带过去给他,告诉他,孩子我养了这么久,现在该你养了!!

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About the game:


USA as a world power? In E-Sim it is possible!

In E-Sim we have a huge, living world, which is a mirror copy of the Earth. Well, maybe not completely mirrored, because the balance of power in this virtual world looks a bit different than in real life. In E-Sim, USA does not have to be a world superpower, It can be efficiently managed as a much smaller country that has entrepreneurial citizens that support it's foundation. Everything depends on the players themselves and how they decide to shape the political map of the game.

Work for the good of your country and see it rise to an empire.

Activities in this game are divided into several modules. First is the economy as a citizen in a country of your choice you must work to earn money, which you will get to spend for example, on food or purchase of weapons which are critical for your progress as a fighter. You will work in either private companies which are owned by players or government companies which are owned by the state. After progressing in the game you will finally get the opportunity to set up your own business and hire other players. If it prospers, we can even change it into a joint-stock company and enter the stock market and get even more money in this way.


In E-Sim, international wars are nothing out of the ordinary.

"E-Sim is one of the most unique browser games out there"

Become an influential politician.

The second module is a politics. Just like in real life politics in E-Sim are an extremely powerful tool that can be used for your own purposes. From time to time there are elections in the game in which you will not only vote, but also have the ability to run for the head of the party you're in. You can also apply for congress, where once elected you will be given the right to vote on laws proposed by your fellow congress members or your president and propose laws yourself. Voting on laws is important for your country as it can shape the lives of those around you. You can also try to become the head of a given party, and even take part in presidential elections and decide on the shape of the foreign policy of a given state (for example, who to declare war on). Career in politics is obviously not easy and in order to succeed in it, you have to have a good plan and compete for the votes of voters.


You can go bankrupt or become a rich man while playing the stock market.

The international war.

The last and probably the most important module is military. In E-Sim, countries are constantly fighting each other for control over territories which in return grant them access to more valuable raw materials. For this purpose, they form alliances, they fight international wars, but they also have to deal with, for example, uprisings in conquered countries or civil wars, which may explode on their territory. You can also take part in these clashes, although you are also given the opportunity to lead a life as a pacifist who focuses on other activities in the game (for example, running a successful newspaper or selling products).


At the auction you can sell or buy your dream inventory.

E-Sim is a unique browser game. It's creators ensured realistic representation of the mechanisms present in the real world and gave all power to the players who shape the image of the virtual Earth according to their own. So come and join them and help your country achieve its full potential.


Invest, produce and sell - be an entrepreneur in E-Sim.


Take part in numerous events for the E-Sim community.


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