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生气了就傻站在大马路上，怎么哄也哄不好。
我说给你买束花吧，不理我；
我说带你去看电影吧，不理我；
我说我们去吃好吃的，还是不理我。
后来他男朋友过来了说：“你谁呀？！”
朋友的老婆出差前夜发现朋友手机发给一个陌生号码短信，
“我老婆出差，明晚老地方见！”
朋友老婆第二天没走，
悄悄在楼下等着看朋友去哪，东躲西藏一路尾随。
最后，华丽丽的看见朋友约了大学宿舍的哥们走进了网吧，
伴随脸上无比的幸福！
和女友甜蜜恋爱中，心血来潮就把女友的素颜照放微博上了。
女友看到后大发雷霆吵着要分手，问她为什么。
女友说：“我宁愿你发裸照！”
昨儿收到女神信息：“晚上去山上看星星吧，
只叫了你喔，不要告诉其他人了。”
幸福来得太突然，我紧张得连晚饭都没吃。
她果然没叫其他人来，星光璀璨的夜晚里，
我TM自己在山上坐了一宿。
姐姐带着两岁半的外甥女回来，
晚上小姑娘要吃零食。
姐姐不给她，然后她就耍脾气了，
她妈妈对她讲：你有求于我还不说好话。
然后小姑娘说：“麻麻，你好漂亮。最近好像又瘦了…… ”
女朋友家吃饭，很紧张。
席间我小心翼翼的对女朋友她妈说：“阿姨，其实我在凑钱买房”。
阿姨一下子就不高兴了：“什么房不房的，
你以为我们家就这么势利？没房子就不嫁了？”
我很感动，刚要说话阿姨又对着我：“当然小伙子你别多心，
有房子我们也不一定嫁。”
同学聚餐一哥们特喜欢装，还特抠。
席间大谈他开的豪车（其实他就是给一个私企老板开车的），
然后就特贱的问我们坐过一百万以上的车吗？
哥们淡淡的回了一句：“哥坐过动车。”
朋友聚会，到饭店后发现大厅没位置了，
然后服务员把我们带到包间，我们刚想点菜，
进来一个服务员说“先生，我们这里包间最低消费一千五！”
朋友一听说要换地方，我站起来跟服务员说：“花生米多少钱？”
她说10块，我说来150盘花生米，
过了一会她们经理来了，给我们道歉说先生对不起，
这里包间随便消费！
“皇上，臣妾今晚身体欠佳……”
“爱妃，你怎么不早说？”
皇上就拿出个夹子夹在了她身上。
地狱来了个人，于是魔鬼说：“你们谁杀人杀的多谁去天堂。”
三个人一听，各有想法。
杀人犯想：“我杀人没有三十也有二十了，肯定是我上天堂。”
将军想：“我南征北战，杀人无数，肯定是我上天堂。”
学生想：“不好，我怎么比啊。”
魔鬼查看三个人的杀人记录。结果学生上了天堂。
在去天堂的路上，学生默默的说：“感谢苍老师！”
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About the game:
USA as a world power? In E-Sim it is possible!
In E-Sim we have a huge, living world, which is a mirror copy of the Earth. Well, maybe not completely mirrored, because the balance of power in this virtual world looks a bit different than in real life. In E-Sim, USA does not have to be a world superpower, It can be efficiently managed as a much smaller country that has entrepreneurial citizens that support it's foundation. Everything depends on the players themselves and how they decide to shape the political map of the game.
Work for the good of your country and see it rise to an empire.
Activities in this game are divided into several modules. First is the economy as a citizen in a country of your choice you must work to earn money, which you will get to spend for example, on food or purchase of weapons which are critical for your progress as a fighter. You will work in either private companies which are owned by players or government companies which are owned by the state. After progressing in the game you will finally get the opportunity to set up your own business and hire other players. If it prospers, we can even change it into a joint-stock company and enter the stock market and get even more money in this way.
In E-Sim, international wars are nothing out of the ordinary.
Become an influential politician.
The second module is a politics. Just like in real life politics in E-Sim are an extremely powerful tool that can be used for your own purposes. From time to time there are elections in the game in which you will not only vote, but also have the ability to run for the head of the party you're in. You can also apply for congress, where once elected you will be given the right to vote on laws proposed by your fellow congress members or your president and propose laws yourself. Voting on laws is important for your country as it can shape the lives of those around you. You can also try to become the head of a given party, and even take part in presidential elections and decide on the shape of the foreign policy of a given state (for example, who to declare war on). Career in politics is obviously not easy and in order to succeed in it, you have to have a good plan and compete for the votes of voters.
You can go bankrupt or become a rich man while playing the stock market.
The international war.
The last and probably the most important module is military. In E-Sim, countries are constantly fighting each other for control over territories which in return grant them access to more valuable raw materials. For this purpose, they form alliances, they fight international wars, but they also have to deal with, for example, uprisings in conquered countries or civil wars, which may explode on their territory. You can also take part in these clashes, although you are also given the opportunity to lead a life as a pacifist who focuses on other activities in the game (for example, running a successful newspaper or selling products).
At the auction you can sell or buy your dream inventory.
E-Sim is a unique browser game. It's creators ensured realistic representation of the mechanisms present in the real world and gave all power to the players who shape the image of the virtual Earth according to their own. So come and join them and help your country achieve its full potential.
Invest, produce and sell - be an entrepreneur in E-Sim.
Take part in numerous events for the E-Sim community.
