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1.家有小萝莉一年级……今年儿童节被选定主持学校六一晚会,搭档主持是一男生……于是每晚都背台词,lz配合模拟男生,每当lz忘词了她都会提醒,爸爸该你了……反复练习……晚会开始的时候,小男孩忘词了停顿了……女儿果断一句笑翻全场:爸爸该你了……小男孩更是语出惊人:麻麻等等我再想想…想…想……我嘞个去,都是一样的练法……

2.昨天从房间出来,老婆马上警告女儿:"别惹你爹,他看球了!

3.今天在某宝上淘的一条裙到货了,迫不及待拆开,发现袋子里掉出来一把饭勺,买裙送饭勺?店家好创意!仔细一看,尼玛是用过的!我实在想像不出店家是在什么情况下给我打包的。。。

4.想到个二逼同事的-----养宠物就养宠物吧,养了个鸭子在宿舍,小时候还好,大了白天黑夜的叫,还到处拉粑粑,大家都很有意见。一天,他出去溜鸭子,到了护城河边,让鸭子去游泳,游了一圈,看鸭子有点脏,就买了块香皂,全身洗了一遍,往河里一放,直接沉底了,从此宿舍安静了。后来网上一查,原来是鸭子羽毛有一层油脂,能浮在水面,结果肥皂把油脂洗掉了,鸭子淹死了。。。

5.表妹(四岁)来我家玩,可烦了,现在终于把她哄睡着了,可刚刚我就上了个厕所,回来后,小家伙继续闹,我烦的不行就对她大吼:你有完没完?到底睡不睡?小家伙估计被吓着了,立马哭哭啼啼的说:我睡了,,,装醒着的,,,

6.lz大学妹子,昨晚去洗漱间洗脸的时候,对面站着一大胸妹子,刷牙时候胸跟着颤,她特无奈的叹了口气,用一个胳膊托着胸继续刷牙,顿时想起室友说我光着膀子都能进男寝了,这个恨啊,啊

7.小的时候老师教育我,长大后千万要远离黄赌毒,如今我真的长大了,才发现,老师,您当年多虑了……这三样哪个是吊丝玩的起的……

8.看非诚勿扰,某男嘉宾择偶标准:高,白,瘦,贫,逗。我幽幽的说了一句我一条也不占啊。。二货弟弟说,你长的挺逗。。。

9.转自烟台晚报】广大中国球迷认为,中国队要想再次进入世界杯只有一个办法。1.通过运作,让国际足联分配一个名额给南极州。2.让中国队加入南极州赛区。3.由中国队和企鹅争夺出线权。4.中国队客场逼平企鹅。5.主场安排在三亚,热死企鹅后出线。目前看来,第4步还挺困难……

10.一男发微博:今天我和女友爱爱,她说神舟十号和天宫一号对接咯,我女友可爱不! 一楼神回复:楼主这还不懂你女友的意思啊,就是说你还有十五天就要和她脱轨了,接下来还有神舟十一号十二号...和她对接!


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About the game:


USA as a world power? In E-Sim it is possible!

In E-Sim we have a huge, living world, which is a mirror copy of the Earth. Well, maybe not completely mirrored, because the balance of power in this virtual world looks a bit different than in real life. In E-Sim, USA does not have to be a world superpower, It can be efficiently managed as a much smaller country that has entrepreneurial citizens that support it's foundation. Everything depends on the players themselves and how they decide to shape the political map of the game.

Work for the good of your country and see it rise to an empire.

Activities in this game are divided into several modules. First is the economy as a citizen in a country of your choice you must work to earn money, which you will get to spend for example, on food or purchase of weapons which are critical for your progress as a fighter. You will work in either private companies which are owned by players or government companies which are owned by the state. After progressing in the game you will finally get the opportunity to set up your own business and hire other players. If it prospers, we can even change it into a joint-stock company and enter the stock market and get even more money in this way.


In E-Sim, international wars are nothing out of the ordinary.

"E-Sim is one of the most unique browser games out there"

Become an influential politician.

The second module is a politics. Just like in real life politics in E-Sim are an extremely powerful tool that can be used for your own purposes. From time to time there are elections in the game in which you will not only vote, but also have the ability to run for the head of the party you're in. You can also apply for congress, where once elected you will be given the right to vote on laws proposed by your fellow congress members or your president and propose laws yourself. Voting on laws is important for your country as it can shape the lives of those around you. You can also try to become the head of a given party, and even take part in presidential elections and decide on the shape of the foreign policy of a given state (for example, who to declare war on). Career in politics is obviously not easy and in order to succeed in it, you have to have a good plan and compete for the votes of voters.


You can go bankrupt or become a rich man while playing the stock market.

The international war.

The last and probably the most important module is military. In E-Sim, countries are constantly fighting each other for control over territories which in return grant them access to more valuable raw materials. For this purpose, they form alliances, they fight international wars, but they also have to deal with, for example, uprisings in conquered countries or civil wars, which may explode on their territory. You can also take part in these clashes, although you are also given the opportunity to lead a life as a pacifist who focuses on other activities in the game (for example, running a successful newspaper or selling products).


At the auction you can sell or buy your dream inventory.

E-Sim is a unique browser game. It's creators ensured realistic representation of the mechanisms present in the real world and gave all power to the players who shape the image of the virtual Earth according to their own. So come and join them and help your country achieve its full potential.


Invest, produce and sell - be an entrepreneur in E-Sim.


Take part in numerous events for the E-Sim community.


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