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.有木有人和楼主一样不知道武侠电视里的招数怎么计算,尼玛经常看一个人对另一个人说,如果你能接我三招,我就咋地咋地。于是他们就打了十五分钟。
2.其实周匪最让老百姓痛恨的是,他居然只杀平民不杀贪官。。。。。。。

3.我是一个富有爱心的人。近30年来,我通过每天坚持交税的方式,默默地资助了好几个公务员,让他们的孩子完成了去外国留学的心愿。

4.在外面跑业务的时候,公司一SB,各种刁难我,不给我发货,要我请客送礼的……刚刚接到公司通知,这个月月底调回公司,要当那SB的上司……

5.小时候,捡了10元钱,换成1毛1毛的,塞进啤酒瓶里,每次花钱就用筷子掏出点,一直花了有半年,当时就觉得自己好有钱啊

6.儿子大二,谈一女友低丑,老婆不愿。说让我教训,我对儿子大叫,现在条件好了,就该找个好的,不像我,当时家里穷,找不到好的!!!

7.带新兵,仨法宝:唠家常、过生日、查铺掖被子。

俺舅第一次带新兵的时候,也查铺,为了不惊醒新兵,掖被子时候总是轻轻的,但跟新兵关系总不是那么亲近。

后来从老班长那里学会了技巧——掖被子动作一定要大,你不让新兵知道,不是白干了?

8.自爆一个。。。本人上大学发现大学太有用了。。。一直有点晚发育,加上一些天然呆。直到上大学,猥琐室友的直言不讳下,才知道为什么在我高中、初中、小学的时候夏天女孩子弯腰捡东西要捂着胸口。。。我TM一直以为她们弯腰时胸口会不舒服。。。我TM从小到大弯腰捡东西也保持捂胸口的习惯。。。我TM是一男滴啊。感觉我的人生观都崩溃了。。。

9.记得以前带表妹游泳,格格格,尼玛这哪里是游泳啊,只见这货扑愣扑愣的在池子里大口大口的喝水,学潜泳,每沉下去和上来一次,必会喝一大口进去,我简直都看不过去了,旁边的人还对她说:小妹妹你莫把水喝光了哦,我们还要游泳的!

10.小时候去餐馆爱撕塑料桌布的倒霉孩子举个手嘞~~

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About the game:


USA as a world power? In E-Sim it is possible!

In E-Sim we have a huge, living world, which is a mirror copy of the Earth. Well, maybe not completely mirrored, because the balance of power in this virtual world looks a bit different than in real life. In E-Sim, USA does not have to be a world superpower, It can be efficiently managed as a much smaller country that has entrepreneurial citizens that support it's foundation. Everything depends on the players themselves and how they decide to shape the political map of the game.

Work for the good of your country and see it rise to an empire.

Activities in this game are divided into several modules. First is the economy as a citizen in a country of your choice you must work to earn money, which you will get to spend for example, on food or purchase of weapons which are critical for your progress as a fighter. You will work in either private companies which are owned by players or government companies which are owned by the state. After progressing in the game you will finally get the opportunity to set up your own business and hire other players. If it prospers, we can even change it into a joint-stock company and enter the stock market and get even more money in this way.


In E-Sim, international wars are nothing out of the ordinary.

"E-Sim is one of the most unique browser games out there"

Become an influential politician.

The second module is a politics. Just like in real life politics in E-Sim are an extremely powerful tool that can be used for your own purposes. From time to time there are elections in the game in which you will not only vote, but also have the ability to run for the head of the party you're in. You can also apply for congress, where once elected you will be given the right to vote on laws proposed by your fellow congress members or your president and propose laws yourself. Voting on laws is important for your country as it can shape the lives of those around you. You can also try to become the head of a given party, and even take part in presidential elections and decide on the shape of the foreign policy of a given state (for example, who to declare war on). Career in politics is obviously not easy and in order to succeed in it, you have to have a good plan and compete for the votes of voters.


You can go bankrupt or become a rich man while playing the stock market.

The international war.

The last and probably the most important module is military. In E-Sim, countries are constantly fighting each other for control over territories which in return grant them access to more valuable raw materials. For this purpose, they form alliances, they fight international wars, but they also have to deal with, for example, uprisings in conquered countries or civil wars, which may explode on their territory. You can also take part in these clashes, although you are also given the opportunity to lead a life as a pacifist who focuses on other activities in the game (for example, running a successful newspaper or selling products).


At the auction you can sell or buy your dream inventory.

E-Sim is a unique browser game. It's creators ensured realistic representation of the mechanisms present in the real world and gave all power to the players who shape the image of the virtual Earth according to their own. So come and join them and help your country achieve its full potential.


Invest, produce and sell - be an entrepreneur in E-Sim.


Take part in numerous events for the E-Sim community.


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