Esim - 【作死刊】关于囧统那些冷笑话
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=====作为一个有节操的报业从业人员,我一般是不会按时发报纸的

什么!!囧统被绑架!!


E世界894天(公元2X14年2月15日,在E世界的说些什么吧板块上,一位叫 gami 的公民发布了一条劲爆的消息
E世界发生严重骚乱,shaka来到豆姨面前说道:‘’恐怖分子劫持了tuwen,索要100 万G,如果不给,他们会点燃tuwen身上的汽油,我是来筹集善款的。”豆姨问:“现在筹集了多少?”shaka答道:“60只打火机。”


于是引发了一场轰轰烈类的黑囧统花样作死大赛。以下是此次花样作死大赛中经典作死摘要。

1、来自公民 JK_MAN 的作品:
E世界中,中国和土耳其的战斗打的很激烈。囧统在后方建议大家有能力的去献血,不管是A型,B型,还是C型……


2、来自公民 uahoi1024 的作品:
听说动物园来了只很丑的猩猩。MarsV、purefly、Rosekaiser还有tuwen去参观。到了关猩猩的房间外MarsV第一个进去,不到10秒就出来吐了。purefly不信邪,第二个进去,结果20秒就出来吐了。Rosekaiser看了看前两人,冷笑了一声进去了,10秒,没出来,20秒,没出来,30秒,出来吐了。tuwen表示这不科学,决定自己亲自进去看看。于是……不到5秒,猩猩出来吐了……


3、来自公民 Survivors 的作品:
今天,tuwen和MarsV、purefly、Rosekaiser去票级。MarsV、purefly、Rosekaiser几下完事儿。只有tuwen一个人在那里“哎呦”了一夜。第二天MarsV、purefly、Rosekaiser问tuwen咋那么牛B,tuwen高声说道:老子爬了一晚上床没爬上去


4、来自公民 246 的作品:
今天tuwen和MarsV、purefly、Rosekaiser去做spa。。。MarsV、purefly、Rosekaiser做完後白皮膚,tuwen.....黑炭臉~~"囧统被黑啦!_囗巾"


谢谢以上5位公民做自己的死为大家带来欢乐。也欢迎大家私信投稿给我。
我先细软跑,下期再见!!




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【这次不忽悠】真的都是冷笑话... (11 years ago)

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About the game:


USA as a world power? In E-Sim it is possible!

In E-Sim we have a huge, living world, which is a mirror copy of the Earth. Well, maybe not completely mirrored, because the balance of power in this virtual world looks a bit different than in real life. In E-Sim, USA does not have to be a world superpower, It can be efficiently managed as a much smaller country that has entrepreneurial citizens that support it's foundation. Everything depends on the players themselves and how they decide to shape the political map of the game.

Work for the good of your country and see it rise to an empire.

Activities in this game are divided into several modules. First is the economy as a citizen in a country of your choice you must work to earn money, which you will get to spend for example, on food or purchase of weapons which are critical for your progress as a fighter. You will work in either private companies which are owned by players or government companies which are owned by the state. After progressing in the game you will finally get the opportunity to set up your own business and hire other players. If it prospers, we can even change it into a joint-stock company and enter the stock market and get even more money in this way.


In E-Sim, international wars are nothing out of the ordinary.

"E-Sim is one of the most unique browser games out there"

Become an influential politician.

The second module is a politics. Just like in real life politics in E-Sim are an extremely powerful tool that can be used for your own purposes. From time to time there are elections in the game in which you will not only vote, but also have the ability to run for the head of the party you're in. You can also apply for congress, where once elected you will be given the right to vote on laws proposed by your fellow congress members or your president and propose laws yourself. Voting on laws is important for your country as it can shape the lives of those around you. You can also try to become the head of a given party, and even take part in presidential elections and decide on the shape of the foreign policy of a given state (for example, who to declare war on). Career in politics is obviously not easy and in order to succeed in it, you have to have a good plan and compete for the votes of voters.


You can go bankrupt or become a rich man while playing the stock market.

The international war.

The last and probably the most important module is military. In E-Sim, countries are constantly fighting each other for control over territories which in return grant them access to more valuable raw materials. For this purpose, they form alliances, they fight international wars, but they also have to deal with, for example, uprisings in conquered countries or civil wars, which may explode on their territory. You can also take part in these clashes, although you are also given the opportunity to lead a life as a pacifist who focuses on other activities in the game (for example, running a successful newspaper or selling products).


At the auction you can sell or buy your dream inventory.

E-Sim is a unique browser game. It's creators ensured realistic representation of the mechanisms present in the real world and gave all power to the players who shape the image of the virtual Earth according to their own. So come and join them and help your country achieve its full potential.


Invest, produce and sell - be an entrepreneur in E-Sim.


Take part in numerous events for the E-Sim community.


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