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Lep pozdrav vsem slovenskim bralcem, tokratni prispevek je namenjen tujcem, zato prosim za vote, saj sem ta članek že objavil v slovenščini in je mogoče ga najti na sledeči povezavi. Angleška verzija je malce drugačna, zato si jo kar preberite. Še enkrat prosim za vote, da pridemo international top 5, hvala vsem!
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Hello everyone, we're breaking the everydays routine by telling some jokes, and today is a very special day. You wondering why? It is time to compare two most important things in the world, the battle of which goes way back in the history, and it is almost epic. You curious? I bet you are. It is BEER VS VAGINA time!
Okay, lets get started:
1. Beer is always wet. Vagina needs a little work.
One point to BEER; score 1:0
2. Warm beer tastes awful.
One point to VAGINA; score 1:1
3. A really cold beer is satisfying.
One point to BEER; score 2:1
4. If after taking a swig of your favorite beer you find a hair between your teeth, you may vomit.
One point to VAGINA; score 2:2
5. If you get home reeking of beer your wife may get mad, make a scene, kick you out, etc. If you get home reeking of vagina your wife may get mad, kick you out, even leave you. There's
definitely a point to be had here, depending on your point of view and personal circumstances. I'll just call it a DRAWfor the time being; score 3:3
6. Ten beers in one night and you can't drive home. Ten vaginas in one night and you don't want to drive anywhere.
One point to VAGINA; score 3:4
7. If you have a lot of beer in a public place, your reputation may suffer. If you eat any vagina in public, you become a legend.
One point to VAGINA; score 3:5
8. You normally don't find old beer.
One point to BEER; score 4:5
9. Too much beer and you'll think you see flying saucers. Too much vagina and you'll think you've seen God.
One point to VAGINA; score 4:6
10. Ripping off a beer bottle label is boring. Ripping off panties is fun.
One point to VAGINA; score 4:7
11. In most countries there's a tax on beer.
One point to [i]VAGINA; score 4:8
12. If you have another beer the first one never gets pissed off.
One point to BEER; score 5:8
13. You can always be sure if you're the first one to open a bottle or a can.
One point to BEER; score 6:8
14. If you shake beer it'll get all agitated but eventually it settles down.
One point to BEER; score 7:8
15. With beer you always have choice: clear, dark, pilsner, ale, lager, etc.
One point to BEER; score 8:8
16. You always know how much beer is going to cost.
One point to BEER; score 9:8
17. Beer doesn't have a mother.
One point to BEER; score 10:8
18. Beer never expects to be hugged for half an hour after you drink it.
One point to BEER; score 11:8
19. Tapping a Keg... easy. Tapping a Vagina... may take you weeks.
One point to BEER; score 12:8
20. Beer won't whine at you when you try to drink it
One point to BEER; score 13:8
Final Score 13 BEER/ 8 VAGINA
That's it! The matter is settled, the clear winner is: BEER
PS: If you are a woman and at this point feel angry, degraded or discriminated against, just remember that Beer would experience none of those feelings, let alone express them, an extra point for BEER!
If you liked my article, please v+s! More to follow
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[VICI] Dejstva o najmočnejšemu človeku na svetu! (13 years ago)
About the game:
USA as a world power? In E-Sim it is possible!
In E-Sim we have a huge, living world, which is a mirror copy of the Earth. Well, maybe not completely mirrored, because the balance of power in this virtual world looks a bit different than in real life. In E-Sim, USA does not have to be a world superpower, It can be efficiently managed as a much smaller country that has entrepreneurial citizens that support it's foundation. Everything depends on the players themselves and how they decide to shape the political map of the game.
Work for the good of your country and see it rise to an empire.
Activities in this game are divided into several modules. First is the economy as a citizen in a country of your choice you must work to earn money, which you will get to spend for example, on food or purchase of weapons which are critical for your progress as a fighter. You will work in either private companies which are owned by players or government companies which are owned by the state. After progressing in the game you will finally get the opportunity to set up your own business and hire other players. If it prospers, we can even change it into a joint-stock company and enter the stock market and get even more money in this way.
In E-Sim, international wars are nothing out of the ordinary.
Become an influential politician.
The second module is a politics. Just like in real life politics in E-Sim are an extremely powerful tool that can be used for your own purposes. From time to time there are elections in the game in which you will not only vote, but also have the ability to run for the head of the party you're in. You can also apply for congress, where once elected you will be given the right to vote on laws proposed by your fellow congress members or your president and propose laws yourself. Voting on laws is important for your country as it can shape the lives of those around you. You can also try to become the head of a given party, and even take part in presidential elections and decide on the shape of the foreign policy of a given state (for example, who to declare war on). Career in politics is obviously not easy and in order to succeed in it, you have to have a good plan and compete for the votes of voters.
You can go bankrupt or become a rich man while playing the stock market.
The international war.
The last and probably the most important module is military. In E-Sim, countries are constantly fighting each other for control over territories which in return grant them access to more valuable raw materials. For this purpose, they form alliances, they fight international wars, but they also have to deal with, for example, uprisings in conquered countries or civil wars, which may explode on their territory. You can also take part in these clashes, although you are also given the opportunity to lead a life as a pacifist who focuses on other activities in the game (for example, running a successful newspaper or selling products).
At the auction you can sell or buy your dream inventory.
E-Sim is a unique browser game. It's creators ensured realistic representation of the mechanisms present in the real world and gave all power to the players who shape the image of the virtual Earth according to their own. So come and join them and help your country achieve its full potential.
Invest, produce and sell - be an entrepreneur in E-Sim.
Take part in numerous events for the E-Sim community.
