It’s been awhile since I’ve last published an article -- and for that I somewhat apologize. It’s not as if I ever write anything important, nor do my words ever have meaning. Most of the times, it’s just a jumble of allusions to corrupt practices and run-on sentences with a hyphen placed here and there to mimic a poorly written paper. That ends today.
The purpose of this paper will be shifting mildly -- and won’t be as biased as usual. That ruins the individual identity of the this paper, but in the process improves the writing process for me. While it’s fun to speculate on the US Budget, it’s really not worth it. While it’s fun to “connect” the dots - it gets old after awhile. So, I am going to back off the “elites” and the “10%” and “transparent” government. It’s all a bit overrated -- and instead I am going to publish my feelings and opinions on events, political figures, and myself. So, prepare for a new era and new volume of papers coming out of For a Few Dollars More
With Great Power
This month concludes the term of Liquid HOMICIDE
. He reigned over our nation for a period of two and a half months -- which were no doubt my favorite so far (considering I got here roughly as he ascended to power). Liquid has a personality which overwhelms you as an individual. He’s rather fun to talk with -- even if you get on his bad side as I have recently done. He’s not an arrogant ass like myself or our fellow citizen Logo.
He’s always eager to play and joke around with you -- no matter whom you are, but when serious matters arise, he expects you to be on your absolute best, “ready for anything” setting.
Trusting a relative newfag (in this game at least), he allowed me to establish the Department of the Interior. He was very calm and understanding and helped me on my way in that position. I took out a 6g loan to cover a company for the Department of the Interior (It has long been merged into the US Army, then sold). I enjoyed this position for awhile, giving out nearly 2,000 wellness.
But of course, Supreme Marshall Horowitz has always been displeased at merely giving food out -- and thus took control of the Department of Defense. While there, Pike, the first and in my opinion, most important Secretary of Defense (Accept it already Pike) we have had as a nation. Pike put in more work than most individuals -- and whipped my butt in League of Legends (It’s quite endemic in the ruling class). Pike was awesome -- and I sorta ruined that later on, but we will get to that later. I established the Department of Defense logo (Not the one we have anymore due to my stupid prank, god, I am an ass). All was good -- and seemed to be working well.
Wreckbeard took over as Secretary of the Interior. He was ambitious and fun to be around -- and it relatively saddens me that he is bogged in school work. I am glad I picked him to succeed me.
Helped with the PEG Change, whatev. Nothing major there. Just dropping the price of the USD to a reasonable level. I see the wisdom in this now Devoid.
Then I made the dumbest error I’ve ever made. That was abusing the privilege of semi-managing the US Treasury. I abused the funds and assets at my disposal to artificially move the PEG up to .05. I had seriously screwed up -- and betrayed the trust of people I considered friends.
I’d like to dedicate this issue of the paper to my friend, Liquid HOMICIDE. A great President and a responsible warden of the United States. Why you picked me, I’ll never know.
What will happen to the United States once Liquid leaves office in four days? I don’t know. We have new candidates running for the office and another responsible warden from the current administration, Khaled, running for President.
1. Uncle Sam
3. Khaled Ibrahim
Hopefully these candidates will be wonderful performers this bout -- and we still have three days for new contestants to pop up! I would like to see these candidates provide more details on how they plan on running the nation after Liquid leaves the office (he’s sticking around, I believe)
I believe that the New America First Party is going to be hosting and moderating a Presidential Debate (contact Feefaroni
for more info). It’d be nice to know what the contents of the debate will be so that candidates can prepare an answer. Also, if you need help setting up a channel, feel free to ask ;3.
Have a paper? Want it to be advertised? Don’t have a banner? No problem. Just message me and I’ll make you a banner so we can make the Media in America a bit better!
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