Login:
Password:

Forgot password Register

Article


9
   
Report


1、五一放假带女友回家,由于是第一次来我家,饭桌上她不好意思放开量的吃,我妈总是往她碗里夹菜!女友用脚碰了碰我,示意我给她解围,我赶紧着对妈说:“妈!你别总是给她夹菜,把盘子往她面前推推就行了,这样好方便她往碗里扒菜……

2、今天和老公逛街,看见一个年轻辣妈带着个萌萌的小女孩。于是我对老公说:快看,好可爱,我也想要一个。(撒娇状)老公立马,一脸坚定的对我说:嗯!你去把小女孩拐走,我去把她妈妈拐走。。。

3、有一次公司搞特卖,有批压了三四年的库存要处理掉,牛仔裤十元一条,鞋子二十一双,当天的口号是:10块钱啦10块钱,10块钱你买不了内衣买不了内裤,但是你能买得了牛仔裤……

4、我朋友孩子两岁了,问起来当初怎么备孕,她说根本没想要这孩子,去医院咨询后舍不得流产费,就生下来了。

5、今天在公交车上,有一对年轻的男女,他们中间隔着一个小男孩,这个时候那个年轻的男生问女孩:“可以留给电话号码吗?”女孩故作害羞的点点头说可以,这个时候中间那个小男孩无奈道:“下次你们要演戏可以不穿情侣装么?”

6、昨天早上,老婆出街买包子回来对我抱怨说:“唉,买几个包子也要这么费劲。” 我问:“怎么啦!”“街角的包子铺新来俩妹子,一看就不是什么正经的货,穿的那么暴露自己也不注意点,一大拨狂蜂浪蝶围着买包子,害得老娘一顿好等。”其实老婆也是挺辛苦的,我想着为她分担一下,于是今天一大早我便起床买包子去了,可是说好了的衣着暴露性感妹子呢?楼主买包子回来,老婆还在床上睡的正香......

7、女朋友问是她漂亮还是前女友漂亮
当然是你了,她化了妆都没有你化成灰漂亮

8、老婆:老公我去隆胸吧?
老公:好啊。
老婆:你果然嫌弃我胸小。哼
老公:.……

老婆:老公我去隆胸吧?
老公:别去了。
老婆:你果然不舍得我花钱。哼
老公:………

9、一女来向心理学家求助:“周围的人都对我有成见,总觉得我爱挑逗异性。我该怎么办?”

心理学家:“我十分理解,小姐。现在我想将一些要点记下来,是否可以请您先不要坐在我的大腿上?”

10、今天在上班,有个同事说,我五一出去玩被雷劈了,我神回复道,那你一定会工作顺利,业绩一定爆!不要问我为什么,因为老天都为你充电了你还想怎样!

Previous article:
苏联被肢解之后的公知1 (11 years ago)

Next article:
苏联被肢解之后的公知2 (11 years ago)

ESim
or
Register for free:
Only letters, numbers, underscore and space are allowed (A-Z,a-z,0-9,_,' ')
Show more

By clicking 'Sign Up!', you agree to the Rules and that you have read the Privacy Policy.

About the game:


USA as a world power? In E-Sim it is possible!

In E-Sim we have a huge, living world, which is a mirror copy of the Earth. Well, maybe not completely mirrored, because the balance of power in this virtual world looks a bit different than in real life. In E-Sim, USA does not have to be a world superpower, It can be efficiently managed as a much smaller country that has entrepreneurial citizens that support it's foundation. Everything depends on the players themselves and how they decide to shape the political map of the game.

Work for the good of your country and see it rise to an empire.

Activities in this game are divided into several modules. First is the economy as a citizen in a country of your choice you must work to earn money, which you will get to spend for example, on food or purchase of weapons which are critical for your progress as a fighter. You will work in either private companies which are owned by players or government companies which are owned by the state. After progressing in the game you will finally get the opportunity to set up your own business and hire other players. If it prospers, we can even change it into a joint-stock company and enter the stock market and get even more money in this way.


In E-Sim, international wars are nothing out of the ordinary.

"E-Sim is one of the most unique browser games out there"

Become an influential politician.

The second module is a politics. Just like in real life politics in E-Sim are an extremely powerful tool that can be used for your own purposes. From time to time there are elections in the game in which you will not only vote, but also have the ability to run for the head of the party you're in. You can also apply for congress, where once elected you will be given the right to vote on laws proposed by your fellow congress members or your president and propose laws yourself. Voting on laws is important for your country as it can shape the lives of those around you. You can also try to become the head of a given party, and even take part in presidential elections and decide on the shape of the foreign policy of a given state (for example, who to declare war on). Career in politics is obviously not easy and in order to succeed in it, you have to have a good plan and compete for the votes of voters.


You can go bankrupt or become a rich man while playing the stock market.

The international war.

The last and probably the most important module is military. In E-Sim, countries are constantly fighting each other for control over territories which in return grant them access to more valuable raw materials. For this purpose, they form alliances, they fight international wars, but they also have to deal with, for example, uprisings in conquered countries or civil wars, which may explode on their territory. You can also take part in these clashes, although you are also given the opportunity to lead a life as a pacifist who focuses on other activities in the game (for example, running a successful newspaper or selling products).


At the auction you can sell or buy your dream inventory.

E-Sim is a unique browser game. It's creators ensured realistic representation of the mechanisms present in the real world and gave all power to the players who shape the image of the virtual Earth according to their own. So come and join them and help your country achieve its full potential.


Invest, produce and sell - be an entrepreneur in E-Sim.


Take part in numerous events for the E-Sim community.


| Terms of Service | Privacy policy | Support | Alpha | Luxia | Primera | Secura | Suna | Vexa | Sora | e-Sim: Countryballs Country Game
PLAY ON